CHARACTER NAME: Constance Ethel Sykes.
BECAUSE… Way back in the wilds of the old board we introduced the idea of matrons and I was delighted. Finally, I said, a chance to be part of the Hogwarts staff while not having to run class activities: the perfect combination of mild authority and general laziness that I crave. I'm pretty sure I reserved the Slytherin matron before Kayte had even posted the placing on Occs and after sourcing a vague older sister character from Rosa's much more established Penny Sykes (secretary to the Minister, so well done Connie for having the much less impress job!) she was born in a haze of sarcasm, wine and my abiding love for Elizabeth Mitchell.

Side note: Connie has the distinction of being my oldest continuous character. All others have had sabbaticals but Connie has always consistently been there drinking wine and making eyes at the ladies. She is also my back-up main account but I used Elladora as I thought she had more authority xD

CREATION DATE: Autumn 2014.
BIRTH YEAR: 1847.
PLANNED DEMISE: I haven't thought about it but I can't imagine it will be dramatic. I can imagine she'll be eaten by cats.
HOGWARTS HOUSE: Slytherin natch. Although she does display a lot of Ravenclaw tendencies and probably picked Slytherin while under the hat because a hot girl was on the table.
BOGGART: A husband that looks suspicious like the Headmaster.
AMORTENTIA: Books. Wine. Sand. Seawater.
PATRONUS: She can only cast a non-corporeal patronus but if she could do it properly it would be a Norwegian forest cat.
RESIDENCE: Hogwarts most of the year. During the summer either guest houses or she mooches into someone's house.

ASOIF/GOT HOUSE: Probably none of them but for argument's sake Mormont. But only in the sense of being a distant cousin appointed to look after Lyanna and make sure she can read.
DIVERGENT FACTION: From a cursory google probably erudite.

CLOSEST RELATION: Her sister Penny is the only other member of her family to have magic.
BEST FRIEND: It used to be Barrett Keene and I have a vague memory of a study group of nerds who were at school together that included Connie, Barrett and the current Minister so that might be nice to revive :P I suspect that her closest actual friend is Holly Scrimgeour which is delightful but something I should probably address. She gets on with the other matrons though both Aideen McClary and Carmelina Cramming are a little complicated for her xD
NEMESIS: If Phineas cared about anything enough to pay attention I'd love it to be him because she's a muggleborn, bluestocking Slytherin but he doesn't so I'm going to arbitrarily designate Theodore Gallivan because the little bastard gave her a black eye in the last duelling tournament.
MOST OFTEN POSTED WITH: Holly and Carmelina.
I DREAM OF POSTING WITH… Phineas! But also the Minister if it turns out I remembered rightly and Connie inexplicably has friends in high places I forgot about.

IN THE MODERN AGE… Okay, so I wrote this part about five different ways then deleted them as the lies they are because modern Connie is probably me tbh xD If you need further details I can show you the picture of me with my "Purrride" rainbow cat t-shirt on, surrounded by books, holding a drink and rolling my eyes fondly at my BFF who is a much more successful human but, bless him, still looks after me and pays for stuff.
DURING THE WAR… Can you honestly say that Connie isn't actually somehow Professor Sinistra, just hanging in the background being quiet and competent and only seen at night?

THOUGHTS ON MUGGLES: They're great. She finds Christmas with her family a chore but suspects the same would be true even if they had magic.
THOUGHTS ON BLOOD PURITY: The culture of pureblood elitism makes her blood boil and given half the chance she would have muggle studies be compulsory.
THOUGHTS ON ARRANGED MARRIAGES: Barbaric.
THOUGHTS ON CLASS DISTINCTION: She believes that educating the masses will solve many problems however doubts that even the most intelligent person would ever be accepted into the upper crust as anything other than a novelty. She likes the working classes perfectly well, though in her comfortable middle class way is probably a bit patronising.

PROGRESS SO FAR:

• Got a Matron job. Dug in for life.
  
• Accidentally got trapped under the mistletoe with a student due to a Peeves prank. Much regretted.
  
• Best friend received death threats. Both Barrett and Connie were indifferent.
  
• Flirted unsuccessfully with the nurse.
  
• Duelled. Very badly.
  
• Got drunk on her 40th birthday and had to be rescued by Rosaline Bennett. She also picked nits out of Blythe Fairchild's hair but it was the former memory she preferred though finding out Rosaline was banging a man was slightly disappointing.
  
• Met Holly and was immediately bemused by her.
  
• Duelled. Slightly better.
  
• Had to chastise Holly and almost immediately became invested in her as a person, determining to help her achieve her goals using the absolute minimal of evil.
  
• Went on the Fog Expedition to Irvingly and somehow helped to break the curse. Connie's sudden burst of competence was 50% wanting to show off to Carmelina and 50% wanting to tell Holly.
  
• Flirted with Carmelina and two other matrons. Potentially successfully but Connie doesn't know that.
  
• Taught several girls about menstruation along the way.
  
• Duelled. Quite well. Until Theodore fucking Gallivan.
  

IMMEDIATE GOALS: My note for Connie on my spreadsheet is thus: "KISS CARMELINA YOU FUCKWIT." I may have to do something along these lines.
LONG-TERM GOALS: Get a girlfriend. Try to curb Holly's evil. More jaunts into the unknown to impress the ladies.