Issue #253 - Cupid Has His Eyes on These Couples This Season
February 15, 2021 – 2:31 AM
The Original Fake News
February 15, 2021 – 2:32 AM
The Original Fake News
| What Makes a Wife? 8 Men Explain! | |
| Very often young ladies gain their understanding of what makes a wife from people of their own sex. Mothers, married sisters, governesses, and even Hogwarts' etiquette professor are all tasked with preparing young ladies for their futures as wives, and very often that means explaining what men desire in a woman. But how accurate is a woman's assumption of what a man appreciates? Do all men enjoy a woman who keeps a neat house? Do all men enjoy a woman who takes an interest in his worth? And do all men desire a woman who can bear as many children as he can count on two hands? We asked the gentlemen of Hogsmeade—with their identities obscured, of course! Our gentleman were asked to evaluate their preferences in appearance, personality, and interests. "In a woman, I generally look for qualities I see in my own mother: a genuine love for keeping house, a sense of brutal honesty, and wide hips. I could not bear to be married to a woman who would allow me to make a fool of myself, nor could I be happy in a quiet household. If you wish to know what a man wants in a wife, look to his mother for inspiration." - Gentleman #1 Our assessment: While we would not suggest that you try and become a man's mother, there is no harm in mimicking some of her mannerisms to trick his mind into having the same sense of comfort with you that he does his mother! (Though we cannot help you with the hips. Invest in better padding?) "I loathe society's image of an ideal woman. Too much emphasis is put on beauty. If I'm to marry, I require a woman who can match my intellect, shares my interests, and is capable of managing the household without my input on matters such as finances. Why should I be expected to sit at a desk all day and then return home to sit at a desk all evening? No, a capable woman is a must." - Gentleman #2 Our assessment: Pretending to be someone you're not will not help you secure happiness in marriage. If you are opinionated, be unabashedly opinionated. If you enjoy politics, do not hesitate to strike up a conversation with a man who seems to share your interests. In the worst case scenario, he will be unimpressed with your unconventional interests; in the best case scenario, you may find your soulmate. "I do not appreciate how society expects women to act demure and clueless around men. Not all of us are the perfect image of an English gentleman; some of us struggle to approach a woman without a clear indicator of her interest. It is the one thing stopping me from finding a wife. I would quickly fall in love with a woman who embraces her truth and does not dull her spirit for the sake of appearances. If she is fond of me, I would rather he say so. I do not care if she is tall, short, too round, or too thin; I want to know who I am spending forever with." - Gentleman #3 Our assessment: Do not assume all men are the same. Seek an assessment of his character from mutual acquaintances and figure out the best way to approach him. Some men may take your façade as an insult to his intelligence, while others may find it rather plain. And more importantly: do not believe a specific trait disqualifies you from love or happiness in marriage! |
"I seek a woman that fits the description of an English Rose, in appearance and character. I deserve nothing less." - Gentleman #4 Our assessment: Some men's affections are not worthy pursuing. Avoid self-righteous men at all cost! "Why is it assumed that all men are in want of a wife? I would rather keep an owl. They are quieter and much less demanding." - Gentleman #5 Our assessment: Do not get your feathers ruffled if a man seems disinterested despite your best efforts; he may be the one with a problem rather than yourself! Some men are simply not up to the task of caring for a wife, while others have not yet achieved the maturity required to provide a stable home for one. There are plenty of men waiting to be wed! "The two most important qualities a woman can possess are beauty and her virtue. It is true that beauty fades with age and virtue does not last forever, but I have no desire to raise a home full of ugly, ill-bred children. I am personally partial to ladies with deep skin, the darkest brown eyes, and pretty curls. And please—no high foreheads or ugly freckles!" - Gentleman #6 Our assessment: Vanity is present in both sexes, but not all men have the same idea of beauty. If you long for golden blonde hair or green eyes, remember that there are men out there whose picture of the perfect woman might capture your likeness perfectly! Another important lesson: do not allow rakish young men to take advantage of you! Men do not like to share. "It is an unconventional opinion surely, but I would not be happy to marry any woman who I would not consider my best friend. I remember my years at Hogwarts spent pining over the girls I knew in my year, and it was there that I realized the potential for love to blossom in friendship! That being said, a woman with a fondness for literature and a mind for chess would make an ideal companion. I have fancied plenty of women and none have looked quite the same, but small feet and hands are most endearing." - Gentleman #7 Our assessment: Do not go into the season believing men and women are so different. Many marriages begin with neither wife nor husband possessing an inkling of affection for the other only to cultivate a sort of friendship and devotion for the other. Treat a man as you would another person, with no mind to differences of sex, and you might find not only a sweetheart, but a companion. "A woman is a woman. As long as she is free from scandal and does not get on my nerves, she will be a candidate for marriage. Unfortunately is is less often a woman whose character I despise, but that of her family. I could not convince myself to propose to a woman if her family is objectionable." - Gentleman #8 Our assessment: Keep an eye on your siblings and watch out for them. The impression they make upon society will often affect society's impression of you. It is sometimes out of our control, but any good, respectable person will understand the effect their actions have on their families! |
February 15, 2021 – 2:32 AM
The Original Fake News
A lady with excellent aesthetic taste and fun-loving nature is seeking a partner in life. He must not be dull, have good taste, and be reasonably well traveled. The lady in question has her own money, so no fortune could compensate for a dull personality. Young lady in possession of means seeks gentleman of kindness and breeding for companionable life match. Age, should not be considered an impediment to a good match. Statuesque woman of the middle class seeks a lifelong companion. She is demure, quiet but kind. She would make the perfect bride for a widower in want of companionship but not the rigors a young wife would bring. |
Healer of good standing but bad luck in matters of the heart seeks companion. He is kind, gentle and can be quite charming. Will you be the one to heal his lonely heart? A responsible and rather handsome working man seeks a working wife of good manners who is not younger than 20 years of age but not older than 36. Blood purity is of no consequence, but an outgoing demeanor is a must. Must be open to the possibility of starting a family. Widows with young children may feel free to reply, should they be both out of mourning and willing to love again. Pureblood man with established position and quiet dignity seeks amiable and intelligent woman for marriage, hopefully within one year. A fondness for poetry, literature, and fine music is desirable although not required. |
The ideal lady would be an excellent conversationalist and competent hostess. Intellectual man of the middle class is seeking a companion for life. Must be of an intelligent nature and enjoy intellectual pursuits. Appearance is not important but an active, curious mind very much is. Ideal would be one who can be a partner in research and invention. An academically minded woman, seeks a husband of similar intellect and pleasant disposition with a view to marriage. The lady is of a large, respectable family with many accomplishments and skills to recommend her to any gentleman. Young lady, soon to enter society, seeks to have a friendly face upon the dance floor when she makes her debut. She is not so foolish as to hope love shall bloom via correspondence, but wonders if friendship might do so instead. The ideal gentleman shall be kind and comfortable, with a kindness towards all creatures, great and small. |
| Happiness is just an owl away! Send a letter in with your personal advertisement or response to have it printed in the next issue. Address your letters to: Lonely Hearts, Witch Weekly. | ||
February 15, 2021 – 2:32 AM
The Original Fake News
| Cupid Has His Eyes on These Couples This Season | |
| As love blooms in the air, those prone to the social scene have likely already begun through Valentine's Day parties of all sorts. But what couples will we see bloom as spring grows more near witheach passing day? Mr. August Echelon-Arnost and Miss Araminta Scrimgeour Many remember the trial of one Mr. Argus Scrimgeour, father of infamous twins Araminta and Annabella Scrimgeour. Notably, the lawyer of the patriarch of the Scrimgeours was Mr. Echelon-Arnost. But perhaps this is not the only Scrimgeour connection we shall see for Mr. Echelon-Arnost. Could sparks fly between the lawyer and the more eligible Scrimgeour sister? Mr. Wilbur Avery and Miss Grace Greengrass Refreshing his status on the eligable market, Mr. Avery has shown intentions of finding a new wife. Will an upcoming debutante catch his eye? Miss Grace Greengrass is no stranger to mourning, having freshly come out of her own mourning of her father. As such, two individuals with broken hearts - though of different circumstances - may be the easiest to relate to and spark a connection. |
Mr. Faustus Prewett and Mrs. Ingrid Rowle Fellow individuals who are no stranger to grief, Mr. Faustus Prewett and Mrs. Ingrid Rowle have both been widowed in their prime years. As one will likely be aware, Mr. Prewett's daughter would likely benefit from having a feminine influence in the home. Given Mrs. Rowle's experience on the social scene, she would easily be a guiding light in the distant future and young Miss Prewett eventually comes of age. Mr. Emrys Selwyn and Miss Ginevra Blackwood Mr. Selwyn and Miss Blackwood have had several recent encounters among the social scene. Could love already be blooming between the two? While the majority of the Selwyn family are known for their value on blood purity, Mr. Emrys Selwyn would be the most likely to marry outside of the expected norm. |
February 15, 2021 – 2:32 AM
The Original Fake News
| Have you seen or heard something around town that society simply must know? Write to us at Witch Weekly and share the news! | Heard Around Town Have you seen how often the Prewett twins have each been spotted in conversation with the unmarried Zabini sisters? Have the Prewetts forgotten their blood status, or have the Misses Zabini concocted some scheme together to snare them both? Did you see the dancers and acrobats at the Sonata? They were certainly quite provocative — I heard tell there were a few daring exchanges and even some stolen moments in the powder room that night! Mr. Emrys Selwyn has already been markedly more sociable at society events this year — do you think he will still be a staple of the coming Season, or have gotten bored by then? I wonder what’s changed. The new modiste in Hogsmeade seems off to a flying start — lots of ladies (some fashionable, and some... less so), at least, have already been giving her work a chance to impress! But has anyone heard much about her? Where did she move from, America? Whatever happened to Miss Elladora Black at the Sonata? One moment she was sitting there and the next — was that a blue frog in her seat? Could someone have transfigured her as a cruel joke? I hope she is not stuck like that! |
Possibly Related Threads…
Thread / Author
Replies
Views
Last Post
Last Post by Witch Weekly
January 30, 2024 – 8:18 PM
January 30, 2024 – 8:18 PM
Last Post by Witch Weekly
May 21, 2023 – 3:41 PM
May 21, 2023 – 3:41 PM
Last Post by Witch Weekly
February 13, 2022 – 11:45 PM
February 13, 2022 – 11:45 PM
Last Post by Witch Weekly
September 21, 2021 – 12:11 PM
September 21, 2021 – 12:11 PM
Last Post by Witch Weekly
November 9, 2020 – 6:02 AM
November 9, 2020 – 6:02 AM
View a Printable Version
Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)
Charmingrp.com was designed with ❤ by Shanté and coded by Olive
Powered By MyBB, © 2002-2024 MyBB Group.
Powered By MyBB, © 2002-2024 MyBB Group.