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If your beau suggests anything untoward, do not oblige him! A firm rebuttal and a reminder of his obligation of respect should be doled out swiftly!

5 Signs Your Courtship Won't Lead To Marriage! When a gentleman asks a lady if he may pay her court, it is usually a mutual understanding between the couple — as well as between families! — that the end result will be a proposition of marriage. However, young gentlemen in particular are prone to a particular foible — they fear marriage! This regretfully does not prevent the fickle-hearted young man from pursuing a young lady, either out of selfishness or a woeful lack of self-awareness. Regardless of their reasons, a young lady must be astute and learn how to tell such gentlemen apart from the rest. Perhaps the most obvious sign your beau is a cad is the length of your courtship (or engagement) thus far. Are you as close as is proper for unmarried people? Have you been so for several months or more? If such a bond has seemingly been established with no sign of further commitment, you may very well have a problem on your hands. Did the last time you subtly mentioned engagement or marriage result in a suspicious lack of color in his cheeks? Does he divert discussions away from such topics with the alacrity of a startled rooster? Beware the reluctant husband for he shall willingly rob you of your most appealing years! Have you waited an uncommonly long time for him to introduce you to his family? Have you been known to the family predating your courtship? Are you quite certain that his family are aware that you are sweethearts? Are his closest friends aware that he is courting? A man ashamed of his behavior will be unwilling to let his family and friends know what he is about. If he makes frequent excuses against introductions, then he is either ashamed of you, his conduct towards you, or has a disturbing secret you ought to get to the bottom of as soon as possible. Is your beau taking you for a walk in the park both figuratively and literally? Has his behavior recently taken an unsavory turn? Is he short of patience, unkind, and irritable where he never was before? There is no excuse for such an abrupt change in treatment and the only possibly conclusion one can draw is that he is too cowardly to end things himself and hopes you will do so for him. It is best to confront such behavior delicately and inquire as to his intentions. Waste not a moment longer on this gentleman even if it means enabling his cowardice! Does he pay more attention to other women? Does he pay equal attention to other women? Are you entirely certain that he has declared himself yours and that you are not mistaking the overly abundant affections of a rake for overtures of courtship? The rake will take all he can without offering anything in return and if you truly are being courted by such a man then his behavior will be unlikely to change if you are wed! As charming as a rake may seem, he is a lascivious sort and every so often they are known to marry to obtain what they could not with seduction outside the bonds of marriage. Of course he may already be married in which case you are doomed whatever may come of it!

  

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10 Facts about J. Alfred Darrow With an expedition underway that includes a vessel named for fashion icon, Mrs Ophelia Devine, we at Witch Weekly cannot help some curiosity about the main man behind the expeditions existence. The following are ten facts that we have gleaned about Mr J. Alfred Darrow, the man that returned from the dead only to return to the sea in a quest to find Avalon. Mr. J. Alfred Darrow is said to be an awkward man which certainly shows in his appearance! 1. His real name is John Alfred Darrow. Always simply referred to as J. Alfred Darrow in print and that being his signature in most of his correspondence, most people did not know that the J stands for John. 2. His birthday is December 20th making him a Sagittarius! Being a Sagittarius makes J. Alfred Darrows best match a Gemini woman. Sagittarius’s are known to be ambitious and overly optimistic individuals. Two traits that J. Alfred Darrow surely has given his current ambition to find the mythical Avalon. 3. He was a Gryffindor in the class of 1873. It comes as no surprise that J. Alfred Darrow was a Gryffindor during his time at Hogwarts. Notable graduates of his year include Aldous Crouch, Thom Pettigrew and Orlando Lovegood. 4. He has tattoos! It is known that J. Alfred Darrow has a tattoo on his chest though no one knows precisely what the tattoo is of. One source has said that it is a ship in honor of his love for sailing. One of the two ships that will be setting sail in search of Avalon! 5. His head contains a wild set of curls. A man with very curly hair, he is also unlikely to usurp Mister Orpheus Parkinson from his throne of being a man with luscious curls. Mister Darrows curls often give him the appearance of being a wild man suggesting that in his time in the wilderness he has forgotten how to use a hair brush. 6. He was declared dead in 1883. When the Sycorax went missing, the crew was declared dead in 1883. J. Alfred Darrow was among this number. 7. He is one of two known survivors of the Sycorax and both were brought home in 1887. In 1887, J. Alfred Darrow and one other man who had been on the Sycorax returned ‘from the dead’ after being rescued and finding their way home. The two are reported to be quite close which is no surprise given what they have been through together. 8. His wand wood is redwood now but it used to be made of maple!. Redwood wands are said to match well to individuals that always make the right choice, land on their feet and take advantage of disasters. Meanwhile, maple wands are well matched to explorers, travelers and high achievers. Given what he know of Mister Darrow, his initial wand that he got as a new Hogwarts student was better suited to him than his current one. 9. He lived among natives as one of them for many years. While the rest of us believed Mister Darrow to be dead, he was actually living among the natives of South America. It is reported that he also adopted their ways which might be why he is as strange as he seems to be. 10. He lives on his ship which is called the Voyager. This reporter has discovered that Mister Darrow does not live in a typical residence - he lives on his ship! It is no doubt due to his no longer being used to living in a civilized house and home.

  

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Ladies of Hogwarts' Class of '87: Where Are They Now?

It’s been almost a year since we saw the ladies of class of 1887 leave the walls of Hogwarts. Many of the ladies debuted and immediately became frequent faces at social outings; others chose to attend finishing school to refine their talents, skills, and manners before debuting; and a select few set forth the question: “What happened to the ladies of 1887?” with their unconventional or outright embarrassing choices! Today Witch Weekly will be giving you a peek into the current lives of the ladies of 1887! Many of Hogwarts 1887 graduates chose the more conservative path of finishing school — and a majority of them were Slytherins! We shouldn’t say we’re surprised: Slytherins are known for their ambitious natures, and what better to assure a life as a successful socialite than to make their home at Pendergast’s School for Young Roses? Among the 1887 enrollments were the Lécuyer twins, Miss Mirielle Lécuyer and Miss Odette Lécuyer! The former is known for being a bit of a wildcard, and we here hope finishing school will be able to correct her unseemly habits before she graduates, lest she end up like her more questionable yearmates. Miss Clarissa Cosgrove — simply a friendly Rose, or one searching for a beau before she debuts? Miss Clarissa Cosgrove, the former Slytherin prefects, also attends Pendergast’s School for Young Roses and has been recently seen in the company of Mr. Albert Pettigrew! We at Witch Weekly cannot decide whether her tactics of approaching gentleman before her own debut are genius or a sign of desperation: what do our readers think? Some of 1887’s graduates chose the more traditional path of an immediate debut, some choosing to attend the Hogwarts Coming Out Ball, while others had more private balls. Miss Nora Abercrombie, Miss Lucille Flint, and Miss Helga Scamander — all former Hufflepuffs who shared a dorm while at school! — were seen spending time with one another at the Witches of Hogsmeade Hospital Association Annual Spring Luncheon last week!

Miss Nora Abercrombie — or will be soon be seeing her as Mrs. Nora Lestrange? It certainly would be an ideal catch! While none of the three ladies have yet found success on the social scene, Witch Weekly can report that Miss Nora Abercrombie was at the Lestrange’s family home over Easter, despite her minimal relation to the family. Perhaps she’s found a prospective husband who’s related to the powerful, pure-blooded clan! We can only wish the same for the other two! Despite debuting during the summer of 1887, Miss Regina Lacey has rarely been seen on the social scene since her debut! We’re surprised rumors about her absence haven’t began circulating sooner — you don’t think her associated with less reputable ladies has caused her to fall down a similar slippery slope, do you? Many other ladies have take far less conventional, and arguably embarrassing paths. Miss Bella Scrimgeour has seemingly made no attempts to change public opinion of her since her debut; rumors have been circulating that she’s been seen at the Augurey Beak Café in London, a known hangout spot for political radicals, men with questionable morals, and rumored criminals! If her parents were smart, they’d have her married off to a gentleman who can control her embarrassing behavior — and soon! Her behavior could only be rivaled by one of her friends, Miss Terpsichore Van Helsing, who has forsaken any expectations placed upon young woman of her status by seeking employment as a hit witch at the Ministry. You’d think she too would seek to change public opinion about her family, but she’s only managed to fan the flames! Her sister, Miss Persephone Van Helsing, has only made marginally better choices than her sister: rather than becoming a hit witch, she now works for the Department of Mysteries. Her decision to purpose an occupation is certainly as mysterious to us as the nature of her job!

  

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Meaningful Wands & The Marriage-Worthy Men Who Wield Them The days are only counting down until the 1888 season is kicked off with the commencement of the annual Hogwarts coming out ball for the graduating seventh years and with that there will one more bunch of women looking for husbands. With an increase in competition it does no harm to come into the season with a plan and an idea of just what man you wish to pursue. Here at Witch Weekly we’ve sat down and compiled a list of who we think to be the most marriage worthy men based on their wand woods. Everyone knows that wand woods have been linked to certain traits in their magic producing abilities and the personalities they prefer and as such wand woods can be linked to a likelihood of success. Our first eligible bachelor is a Mr Albert Pettigrew. Mr Prettigrew, age twenty-nine, is a member of the Ministry of Magic’s research committee and is said to wield a wand of vine. Those who posses vine wands are said to seek a greater purpose making him a man of great ambition. However, seekers beware, vine wands are also said to choose someone of hidden depths and we at Witch Weekly can make no promises what those hidden depths are though we may have our ideas such as just how much wealth he has (we believe quite a lot) or a secret romantic side. Next, a Mr Xavier Montfault. A familiar name to most, Mr Montfault, age thirty, is the recently named head auror, and is in possession of a wand of cypress. With this wand, it is no question that he has become the head auror as cypress wands are known to pick wizards with a heroic disposition. He’s bound to be bold in his actions, not just at work but in a relationship to and as such might not be the best choice for the more shy debutante. Still, he is to be self-sacrificing and likely would put his wife before himself and protect you with all of his ability. A Mr Richard Gladstone, thirty, is the healer-in-charge of the Magical Bugs division of St. Mungos. He wields a wand of alder which waits him to be considerate, likeable, and most helpful which would make him a lovely husband for the more quiet and demure woman. But think twice that this would make him weak as those with alder wands are known to be quite powerful and well adapt at non-verbal spell casting. Mr Quincey Honeyduke is someone we must include. At age thirty, he is the proprietor of a very well known shop - as you guessed, Honeyduke’s Sweet Shop. With a poplar wand, it's no surprise his business endeavors have gone so well. Poplar is well known for its sense of integrity and running a shop with such characteristic is only bound to show such wonderful results as he had in the ten years that Mr Honeyduke has been running his shop. A man to rely on, he would make a wonderful husband for any middle class woman seeking a steady life. Head of the department of Magical Games and Sports, Mr Edmund Grimm - who just turned thirty-three this past week - is in ownership of a wand constructed with rowan. Rowan is said to be quite protective and has the abilities to cast all sorts of defensive charms that prove to be quite difficult to break. Clear hearted and pure, Mr Grimm would make a strongly devoted husband to any wife. Lastly, Mr Clinton Podmore, age thirty-one, is the head of the Beast Division at the Ministry of Magic. Equipt with a wand of blackthorn, Mr Podmore rivals Mr Montfault for his magical abilities. Blackthorns are well suited to those with a warrior spirit and as such any wife of his would have no need to worry for his safety whenever he is faced with any dangerous beast his line of work may put him before. He isn’t all rough however, as just like blackthorn bushes with their wicked thorns, Mr Podmore is sure to have a sweeter side but like the blackthorn bush’s oh so sweet berries.

Mr Albert Pettigrew. Mr Xavier Montfault. Mr Richard Gladstone. Mr Quincey Honeyduke. Mr Edmund Grimm. Mr Clinton Podmore.

  

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