Valerian exhaled a breath he hadn't been aware he was holding as Greengrass finally relented. Even sitting around the room in awkward silence would have been better than following Greengrass, clothes and hair still mussed, searching for the ghost who had passed through the room. He kept his hand on Greengrass, not wanting to pull it away. He hoped Greengrass would do something, because at least a little reciprocal touch would give him affirmation that their affair wasn't coming to an end because of their unwelcome visitor, but Greengrass was just sitting there, staring at him with pink cheeks and a look in his eye that was doing things to his body that had never happened before. His chest constricted with anxiety, but his stomach was fluttering and all he could think was how the little freckles on Greengrass' nose stood out better when his face was pink, but then he felt guilt because Greengrass' face was only pink because of him—
And then Greengrass had leaned across the bed, and Greengrass had pecked him on the lips, and Valerian stilled. He didn't close his eyes, he didn't kiss him back, and then he felt absolutely idiotic because Greengrass had leaned away and was looking off to the side.
He felt the urge to crawl towards Greengrass and kiss him this time, partly because he thought it might help further soothe him but also because he felt like he'd like an opportunity to kiss him. But he didn't. He didn't and his heart skipped a beat when he realized he'd missed the window to do it, because Greengrass suggested he leave, and Valerian wanted to say No, don't. They hadn't resolved this, hadn't figured out how to handle the ghost, hadn't been reassured that they would be able to move forward from this, even if Greengrass' kiss indicated that he wasn't done with him. Valerian decided this—the awkwardness, the uncertainty—was not a feeling suited for him, and pushed himself off the bed in order to reel in his emotions before they started showing on his face.
"I'll see you out," he said quietly, leaning down to pick up the remaining clothes off the floor. His cheeks were pink by the time he'd stood up to toss them to Greengrass' side of the bed, and he struggled to meet the other man's eyes.
And then Greengrass had leaned across the bed, and Greengrass had pecked him on the lips, and Valerian stilled. He didn't close his eyes, he didn't kiss him back, and then he felt absolutely idiotic because Greengrass had leaned away and was looking off to the side.
He felt the urge to crawl towards Greengrass and kiss him this time, partly because he thought it might help further soothe him but also because he felt like he'd like an opportunity to kiss him. But he didn't. He didn't and his heart skipped a beat when he realized he'd missed the window to do it, because Greengrass suggested he leave, and Valerian wanted to say No, don't. They hadn't resolved this, hadn't figured out how to handle the ghost, hadn't been reassured that they would be able to move forward from this, even if Greengrass' kiss indicated that he wasn't done with him. Valerian decided this—the awkwardness, the uncertainty—was not a feeling suited for him, and pushed himself off the bed in order to reel in his emotions before they started showing on his face.
"I'll see you out," he said quietly, leaning down to pick up the remaining clothes off the floor. His cheeks were pink by the time he'd stood up to toss them to Greengrass' side of the bed, and he struggled to meet the other man's eyes.
