She nodded once and pulled her focus from him again. Zach's resigned acceptance pained her more than any argument would have. Of course, he would be understanding and reasonable. Of course, he wouldn't deter her from leaving. It wasn't in his nature to be selfish. No, that was all her.

"You ..." Jo didn't know how to finish the thought. You shouldn't wait, you should move on, you shouldn't miss me, you are the love of my life all died on the tip of her tongue. Alfred told her it was alright not to be ready for this kind of love, but as she stood floundering for even the most minor things to say none of it felt alright. Not being able to love him as he deserved to be love felt like her biggest mistake of all.

She dropped her eyes to the snow covered ground between them. Continued lies to him caught in the back of her throat. Zach had provided her an easy cover without knowing, but Jo couldn't accept it. "I'm not sure yet." She answered honestly, already fearing his reaction.