Everything she was saying was logical and correct, on the one hand. He wasn't sure what he was feeling at the moment, but happy wasn't part of it. This was too much, too fast, and they were both still trying to orient themselves to this new life they were supposed to share together. They didn't even have a place to live. Even after they'd moved back and settled into some sort of routine — and even if they were somehow able to patch up the shreds of this relationship into something that resembled mutual affection, or some shadow of it — Ben still wasn't sure he'd be ready for something like this. He certainly wasn't ready for it now.
The fact remained, though, that she was thinking about going through with this — this thing that would, in essence, kill his child, and might very well kill her in the bargain — and she hadn't even been planning to tell him.
All at once he felt exhausted. What were they doing here? What were they playing at? They couldn't pretend to be a couple, and they couldn't possibly try to get to a place of mutual understanding at some point in the future, if they were starting here. He'd thought things had been looking up, after the card game, but now he was realizing that not only had that not been any sort of real progress, but the start line wasn't even where he'd thought it had been.
"You weren't going to tell me," he repeated, emphatically this time. "Melody — what — what am I supposed to do here? How the hell am I supposed to try and be your husband if you're — if you're going to act like this? If you aren't even going to pretend you care about me, and what I want, or what I think? If you're going to just do whatever you think is best at every turn and not even ask me? This is the night at the ball all over again," he said bitterly. "You didn't learn a goddamn thing from any of that, did you? Or — no, you know what? I'm the one who didn't learn anything. You were pretty damn clear that you didn't care about me, and you didn't trust me, and it was stupid of me to think you might've changed."
MJ made this <3
The fact remained, though, that she was thinking about going through with this — this thing that would, in essence, kill his child, and might very well kill her in the bargain — and she hadn't even been planning to tell him.
All at once he felt exhausted. What were they doing here? What were they playing at? They couldn't pretend to be a couple, and they couldn't possibly try to get to a place of mutual understanding at some point in the future, if they were starting here. He'd thought things had been looking up, after the card game, but now he was realizing that not only had that not been any sort of real progress, but the start line wasn't even where he'd thought it had been.
"You weren't going to tell me," he repeated, emphatically this time. "Melody — what — what am I supposed to do here? How the hell am I supposed to try and be your husband if you're — if you're going to act like this? If you aren't even going to pretend you care about me, and what I want, or what I think? If you're going to just do whatever you think is best at every turn and not even ask me? This is the night at the ball all over again," he said bitterly. "You didn't learn a goddamn thing from any of that, did you? Or — no, you know what? I'm the one who didn't learn anything. You were pretty damn clear that you didn't care about me, and you didn't trust me, and it was stupid of me to think you might've changed."
MJ made this <3