The truth was still foreign, and Jude still felt numbed to it all, the world a little hazy at the corner of his vision. Kieran felt more real, with his head resting there - and Jude wasn't sure holding him there like that was helping, but he couldn't find the will to let go just yet. If anything, he felt a compulsion to pull him closer, wanted to fold him into his arms properly and stay there, eyes closed tight, until enough time had ebbed away for all this to be forgotten, if not undone.
As it was, his gaze was still fixed on Kieran's bowed head, receiving his next words with careful consideration.
"It could be me," Jude said suddenly. "It could be me, too. You don't have to do this alone." All their friends would be there for him, if only they had any inkling; and surely Eileen already was, through it all; but this was different, this truth was more terrible. And for some reason, he'd come here.
So it was up to Jude to do something. Kieran couldn't be severed from the monthly transformations or spared the torment of them - Jude would have spared him in a heartbeat if he could - but there must be some way to share the responsibility. To lessen the weight of what lingered past each full moon... to make it survivable for him, somehow.
And this would not happen again. It couldn't.
But nature was pitiless, and the moon would be full again tonight.
"I want to help." He added softly. "If you'll let me."
As it was, his gaze was still fixed on Kieran's bowed head, receiving his next words with careful consideration.
"It could be me," Jude said suddenly. "It could be me, too. You don't have to do this alone." All their friends would be there for him, if only they had any inkling; and surely Eileen already was, through it all; but this was different, this truth was more terrible. And for some reason, he'd come here.
So it was up to Jude to do something. Kieran couldn't be severed from the monthly transformations or spared the torment of them - Jude would have spared him in a heartbeat if he could - but there must be some way to share the responsibility. To lessen the weight of what lingered past each full moon... to make it survivable for him, somehow.
And this would not happen again. It couldn't.
But nature was pitiless, and the moon would be full again tonight.
"I want to help." He added softly. "If you'll let me."
