The most shameful little groan escaped as Samuel moved back over her. She needed to stop this for both of them, draw a boundary that could bind them to the better angels of their nature. She needed to not rise off of the table just enough to claim his lips again. She needed to not press her hips against him. She needed to do so many things to protect them both, but she couldn't resist touching him. She'd spent decades starving herself of touch, avoiding anything but the chaste affection of her son. She wondered as she let her hands rest on Samuel's hips how long had passed since he'd been adored like this. She didn't wonder at lovers; she was strangely unconcerned about whomever kept his bed warm on occasion. But adoring him was all she could think to do.
She treasured him in every facet and delighted in the nuances she'd learned to read in his face. Did anyone else know the thinning of his lips during staff meetings hinting at his impatience with the headmaster? Had anyone else noticed he moved about the room like it was a chessboard to be manipulated; how he weaponized space to put someone on the retreat? He radiated signals to her, pieces of the puzzle that continued to evolve as she studied. His eyes, a beautiful conflict of colors, told her volumes if she was brave enough to hold his gaze. It felt like a dare at first, as if he challenged her with the weight of his eyes. He would reveal himself, piece by piece, if she could tolerate his calculating stare. She had, willingly, but Themis was certain Samuel had seen shadows she had never wished to share. He had handled the glimpses of her humanity well.
Samuel was incredibly strong. She had felt it in his magic and read how he carried his body. He was powerful in a way that should have repelled her and labeled him a threat. But Themis couldn't stay away from him. She had no solid evidence to support her conclusion, but Samuel was safe. He wouldn't harm her intentionally. She owed him the same.
Reluctantly gentling her kiss, she gave him a regretful smile: "I'm afraid you'll resent me if I don't stop this. And, selfishly, I don't want you to stop." She barely kept herself from pouting. She didn't bother to stop the hand that went to his hair, wanting to memorize the texture. "You will come back, Samuel." It was a warning to God as much as man, her resolve firm for them both. "You'll come back, and I will show you how I treasure you." It was the best promise she could give him and the only words she'd mastered that came near her feelings. She wasn't naming the overwhelming emotions and sensations Samuel caused; she couldn't objectively name anything when it came to Samuel. Merlin, she needed to regain her control.
She treasured him in every facet and delighted in the nuances she'd learned to read in his face. Did anyone else know the thinning of his lips during staff meetings hinting at his impatience with the headmaster? Had anyone else noticed he moved about the room like it was a chessboard to be manipulated; how he weaponized space to put someone on the retreat? He radiated signals to her, pieces of the puzzle that continued to evolve as she studied. His eyes, a beautiful conflict of colors, told her volumes if she was brave enough to hold his gaze. It felt like a dare at first, as if he challenged her with the weight of his eyes. He would reveal himself, piece by piece, if she could tolerate his calculating stare. She had, willingly, but Themis was certain Samuel had seen shadows she had never wished to share. He had handled the glimpses of her humanity well.
Samuel was incredibly strong. She had felt it in his magic and read how he carried his body. He was powerful in a way that should have repelled her and labeled him a threat. But Themis couldn't stay away from him. She had no solid evidence to support her conclusion, but Samuel was safe. He wouldn't harm her intentionally. She owed him the same.
Reluctantly gentling her kiss, she gave him a regretful smile: "I'm afraid you'll resent me if I don't stop this. And, selfishly, I don't want you to stop." She barely kept herself from pouting. She didn't bother to stop the hand that went to his hair, wanting to memorize the texture. "You will come back, Samuel." It was a warning to God as much as man, her resolve firm for them both. "You'll come back, and I will show you how I treasure you." It was the best promise she could give him and the only words she'd mastered that came near her feelings. She wasn't naming the overwhelming emotions and sensations Samuel caused; she couldn't objectively name anything when it came to Samuel. Merlin, she needed to regain her control.
![[Image: Bka0H0x.jpeg]](https://i.imgur.com/Bka0H0x.jpeg)