I made a cup of tea from the kettle in the common room, though I try to spend as little time in there as I can today. It is not as good as yours, it simply reminds me of you. As do the words that arrived in your letter. Just reading them in your voice was more a comfort than the words themselves.

Is it really so easy to be so charitable to those who have wronged you? Does it matter if it is you, yourself, or the whole group you've been part of for years? Ravenclaw feels like part of my blood, blue and silver and bronze are colors I could go my whole life without becoming bored with and I know by heart which chairs in the common room have the best light for reading in the afternoon. I truly think my soul would be torn apart if I could never call myself a Ravenclaw again. And my heart tells me it matters little whether someone wrongs Ravenclaw or wrongs me, it hurts all the same.

Perhaps it would be easier if I was older, if I had a job with an income and a home and a family to call my own. Then such an incident would pale by comparison, I think. Everything here is so connected, Zin. We go to classes together, eat together, dorm together. I have to face them every day, and today has been impossible upon impossibility. I waited until just the end of breakfast and midday meals to get something, and I am dreading dinner too much to have any appetite.

I wish I had your grace, Zin. Or Daffy's courage. Or Dorothea's way with everyone. I would give anything to switch places! Dot would know just what to say in apology, Daffy would stand in front of her House without batting an eye, and you would probably give a hug to all the girls and feel better for it. Hugging won't mend wounds or torn dresses —you should have seen Miss Parkinson afterwards!— or erase memories, Zin, and words feel inadequate for such a huge misstep. I have far too few ingredients for the potion this House so desperately needs.

I want so much to be the person you see in me. There's a mirror in my dorm and I dare not glimpse into it now. I'm far too afraid I will see someone completely different than you do. How am I supposed to face others when I cannot even face myself?!

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