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Nova reflected on what she knew of her brother's capacity for forgiveness and understanding. He had always been more impulsive than her, more headstrong, more emotionally connected. Not that she had a disconnect exactly but she had always found her feelings very easy to confine and control. She felt things, very acutely in fact, but they very rarely overcame her judgement. Whether this was a testament to her self-control and composure, or a sign that her emotions ran on a different frequency to most other people, she couldn't say for sure but she preferred to believe the former. Reuben felt things strongly too, of all her brothers she knew him to be the most sensitive, she'd sensed it about him before she could even remember, before she'd had words to communicate it. There had been a time when her silence had been taken as a sign of stupidity, but Reuben had never written her off. He'd been the only one to see beyond her blank, lingering stares.

He wasn't cold, he didn't freeze people out, he was impulsive but he wasn't too proud to apologize or admit when he was wrong. He might have put physical distance between himself and the family when they'd been at odds but he'd never cut ties and turned his back. He was loyal, he was forgiving, he was patient. Which gave his mistrust of Melody some weight. He'd protected her when Nova had made plain her suspicions about his wife, he'd taken the blame and with such fervor that she'd briefly believed him. If now he was faltering, if he wasn't clinging to smallest shred of possibility that she'd betrayed him against her will then something had brought him past the point of wishful thinking. Perhaps he had loved her and perhaps that's what had changed, but if it were only that then he wouldn't be asking her what he should do. The answer would be obvious, stay put for the sake of his daughter and make the best he could of it. Enough of him, for reasons she would probably never know, was convinced that was no longer an option.

Nova knew that the Elmer Macmillan debacle had irreparably altered his view of her and at the time she thought she'd sullied their relationship beyond salvaging. It was now that she started to wonder if perhaps in the end it had strengthened it. Perhaps that was the only reason he'd come to her with this, now. She'd sacrificed some idealized version of herself for something more real, had they ever been closer than they were at this moment? He'd confided in her before but not like this. He was more intuitive than he gave himself credit for and that was what she had to trust now.

I think you can forgive her, I think you will forgive her, because that is who you are. But I think you mistake forgiveness for what she has done, with forgiveness for who she is. Nova paused for a moment and stared hard at a fleck on the wallpaper over Reuben's shoulder. She was rambling and it probably wasn't going to get anymore helpful. She sighed heavily and steeled herself to continue. That you can't believe her suggests that either you must not want to believe her or she has given you cause to mistrust her. Perhaps both. I do believe if you considered her an honest woman you would feel hurt and betrayal, but also forgiveness and compassion. If it were me, would you not believe I had been taken advantage of? Would you not be laying the blame at someone else's door? A brief pause as she once again thought of the letters. Even now? She trusted he'd catch her drift, she also trusted his opinion of her hadn't jumped straight to wanton harlot over an unwise correspondence. So whether she is telling the truth, or whether she is not, is immaterial. If your opinion of her has been brought so low that your first thought is to her guilt and not her innocence then I believe she must have given you valid reason. Is there any chance of reasoning with her do you think?

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Outfit | Tag: Reuben Crouch | Notes: