Vince felt he could have died when Cass’ arms came up to wrap around him. If he snuggled into the blonde’s neck, it was an unconscious action he didn’t dwell on. This feeling was everything in the world to him, any and everything he’d ever need to survive again. Vince knew Cass was the end-all-be-all in his life and it was absolutely wretched to realize how close he’d come to almost sacrificing… that. In this moment Vincent realized he’d never dare do it again. He wouldn’t risk losing Cass for good because next time, if they fractured once more, he couldn’t be sure Cass would hold onto him.

He’d rather lose his dignity than his oxygen.

I’m never gonna dance again… the way I dance with you.

As they both stood, Vince watched Cass with big green eyes, stark and vulnerable in a way that still made him unsure. He reached up a hand to scratch at his elbow and held it miserably. He could tell from Cass’ hasty reply that the other was simply agreeing to appease him; Vince couldn’t be sure he actually meant it, but Cass had never been a liar, so he let it go. Especially as the sounds of a carriage floated over the stale evening towards them, Vince knew better than to make a scene. They were lucky the street had been virtually abandoned a few moments prior and his face heated as he turned to follow Cass quickly.

Vince didn’t think much of the distraction as Cass led him around the house and towards a small river bank. They were both in need of some distance from the almost deadly, and he was glad Cass was ready to try and move past all of this. Still, Vince held his elbow awkwardly, unsure. They paused by the river bank then and Vince turned his expression over the river. “It’s beautiful,” he said softly. Add it was.

There were few parts of London that seemed safe, quiet or even natural. This location seemed to manage all three for Cass; Vince felt privileged, like he’d been let in on a secret. It didn’t make him feel entirely better, but he dropped his hand from his arm and reached out to tug Cass’ away from his picking. (He hated when the other fussed at himself.) If shivers ran up his arm and down his spine like flames, if his fingers lingered just a touch too long, Vincent tried not to notice as he pulled away. Another blush brushed against pale cheeks and the Slytherin felt conflicted. He was both angry at himself and embarrassed for feeling this way considering the disaster his initial impulses had ignited. Vince turned away and tried to hide his expression by gazing out over the far side of the bank. He hated feeling like he had to shutter a part of himself away from Cass but he supposed he ought to get used to it.

“It’s special isn’t it?” He asked, rather obviously. Of course it is, that annoying little voice drawled condescendingly in the back of Vince’s mind. He ignored it. “I… I’m glad you still feel like you can share it with me.” Vince kept his expression hidden as he ran a hand through curly strawberry locks and tugged at his hair a touch. He was frustrated with himself. “I… I’ll make sure it never happens again.” He finally whispered.

There was a finality to the word ‘never’ that felt like a slammed door in his face. It hurt, almost as if it hit him on the other side. Vincent set his teeth. He would sacrifice his own needs and desires if it meant he could keep Cass, forever.

Should have known better than to cheat a friend…
Waste this chance that I’ve been given.

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   Cassian Valenduris