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"We're Too Old For This"
#1
— The —
Daily Prophet
Price One Knut
May 30th, 1889
"We're Too Old For This"
Families of Stone Children Face Unexpected Challenges

Parents of one child who had been transfigured into a garden cherub and sold as statuary were shocked to be reunited with their son earlier this week.

Matthew and Sarah Farrow, of London, told us their oldest son Perry had been apprenticed to a carpenter at the age of six after they had answered an advertisement seeking new apprentices. "At the time, our business was struggling," Matthew Farrow, a freelance magical repairman, explained. "In order to do this sort of work, you need a wand and some basic spells — it didn't seem practical to keep him here and try to teach him my trade, so we were looking for a better solution."

The Farrows sent their son to his apprenticeship and paid service dues through the mail for the next several years, assuming that they had given their son a better life. They were not troubled by the lack of communication from him. "He hadn't learned to read before he left," Mrs. Farrow explained. "So it wasn't as though we were expecting him to write. The carpenter told us he was doing well enough."

The carpenter, as it turned out, never existed at all; within days of answering the advertisement for an apprentice, Victoria Hatfield had transfigured Perry Farrow into a statue. He was subsequently sold to a magical family in London, then later transferred hands until he ended up in a garden in Wales, where he was eventually discovered by the Ministry's Improper Use of Magic Office.

Perry remembered enough details of his former life to communicate information to the Ministry, who was able to locate the Farrows and reunite them with their child. Matthew and Sarah, however, are feeling overwhelmed by their son's return.

"We stopped sending his apprentice dues nearly a decade ago," they explained. "He ought to be fully grown by now. All of his siblings are." The Farrows' other children include two daughters who have left the house to pursue work as housemaids (aged 19 and 17), and three boys, two of whom work with their father (aged 16 and 15) and one of whom has secured a shop position and lives on his own (aged 20). "What are we supposed to do with a six year old now? We're old — too old to be raising children who ought to have been grown already."

Dozens of other children remain in Ministry custody or in foster homes while attempts are made to discover their original families. It remains to be seen, however, how many will be able to be reunited — and how many of those will be reunited happily.
Gulliver Doran
Written by Lynn



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