Spring, 1881 - the day after the last day of term, Wellingtonshire (Seventh Year)
Basil was still fuming the next morning when he woke up in his big, cold bed in Wellingtonshire. He hadn’t slept a wink all night and his entire reception home was blurry, as if he’d dreamt it. Instead, the Ravenclaw’s mind was filled with roiling memories of Gus Lissington. Good memories, sweet memories, and then the hell that had rained down upon them yesterday. Basil screwed his eyes shut at the thought. He was in a cold sweat and the sun had yet to rise over the horizon, his room still dark. He knew he couldn’t possibly sleep any more than the tiniest bit he already had. His mind was too involved in the waking nightmare of his new reality. Standing from the bed angrily, Basil frowned into the darkness. He knew his desk was piled with things from Hogwarts he had yet to unpack; quills, parchment, texts. All things he valued once upon a time.The very sight of them made him sick now.
On a whim, Basil stormed over to his desk and shoved the whole pile into a heap on the floor. It crashed down with a boisterous noise that probably would have awoken his entire house had their rooms not been so spread apart. Basil didn’t care. He plucked the nearest quill and wrinkled piece of parchment from this mess and began to scrawl angrily across it.
Spring, 1881
Gus
Lissington.
I despise everything you’ve made me feel, everything you’ve made me realize could be.
There is nothing in this world that I could ever cherish as dearly as you, my darling Gus, and yet you’ve ruined me forever.
How could I ever expect to be happy again? How can I even pretend at happiness without you at my side?
Asking either of us to live in such a way would bring ruin, tragedy, and complete humiliation - not to mention danger - upon both our heads. Our families would be thrust into a chaos unlike anything they deserve.
And yet, I still want it - want you - in ways that frankly should not be possible. You misunderstand me when I say impossible. I know not all the secrets of the natural world, but I know there is little recorded on this anomaly and even less is favorable. You must see why I reacted with reservation.
It simply isn’t done.
I won’t rehash our disagreement; I won’t even acknowledge it if that is what you wish. I only write to regain some semblance of what we had. You are the oxygen I require to survive. Without you, in any capacity, I am a husk of what once was. There is no turning back for me now.
yours most faithfully,
Basil
Post-script.
My heart, for what it’s worth, has always, and will always, be with you. Even as it burns and turns to ash without your soul next to mine, fueling it for all eternity.
Lissington.
I despise everything you’ve made me feel, everything you’ve made me realize could be.
There is nothing in this world that I could ever cherish as dearly as you, my darling Gus, and yet you’ve ruined me forever.
How could I ever expect to be happy again? How can I even pretend at happiness without you at my side?
Asking either of us to live in such a way would bring ruin, tragedy, and complete humiliation - not to mention danger - upon both our heads. Our families would be thrust into a chaos unlike anything they deserve.
And yet, I still want it - want you - in ways that frankly should not be possible. You misunderstand me when I say impossible. I know not all the secrets of the natural world, but I know there is little recorded on this anomaly and even less is favorable. You must see why I reacted with reservation.
It simply isn’t done.
I won’t rehash our disagreement; I won’t even acknowledge it if that is what you wish. I only write to regain some semblance of what we had. You are the oxygen I require to survive. Without you, in any capacity, I am a husk of what once was. There is no turning back for me now.
yours most faithfully,
Basil
Post-script.
My heart, for what it’s worth, has always, and will always, be with you. Even as it burns and turns to ash without your soul next to mine, fueling it for all eternity.
The above was never sent.