April 20th
To Miss Zelda Fisk:

I made an ass of myself last night. I was drunk, and not expecting to see you — not that any of that excuses what happened. A gentleman would never have taken advantage of a young lady's virtue the way I did — and, in fact, a gentleman ought never to have put himself in a position to do so in the first place.

The truth is that I don't know what to do next. There are ways a gentleman might go about correcting a mistake like this, but as we've already established I cannot dare call myself a gentleman and, no matter what else happens, the Voyager will still be setting sail on Sunday. I don't know what I can offer you except my apologies, and they are worth nothing by comparison.

I do hope that you'll write if there's any sign of trouble. If all goes according to plan I should never be more than a few days away by owl.

J. Alfred Darrow

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

Mr. Darrow,

April 21st

You can't blame yourself fully, and you're not the only one who made an ass out of themselves. Good girls aren't supposed to do what we did, and I'm supposed to be smart enough to know better.

So. I'm sorry for that. I don't know what to do next either.

I don't think anyone knows, if that's the sort of trouble you're asking about.

Good luck on the Voyager. I hope you find everything you're looking for.

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Miss Zelda O. Fisk

  

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AMAZING set by MJ

April 21st
To Miss Zelda Fisk:
I can't possibly attribute any of the blame to you when you had no prior experience with such things. You may have said 'yes' but there's no way you could have really known what you were agreeing to. I ought to have been the responsible one in that moment, and I wasn't.

I want to be clear that you can write me if there's any sort of trouble, and I'll do what I can to help. Whatever that entails.

J. Alfred Darrow

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

May 22nd
Miss Zelda
I worry about you a lot.

I suppose I don't really know you well enough to do that, but I do anyway. I think that last month was the first time you had done anything like that — and I know, at least, it was the first time you'd actually done that — and I know I already said I'm sorry, but I just keep coming back to it and thinking that it shouldn't have happened like that. It shouldn't have been me.

I grew up with all of these ideals and this whole system of morality that was entirely subverted when I was abroad and living with people who didn't do things the way the English do at all, and so I don't know exactly what I believe any more about a lot of things. I don't know if it's wrong to do what we did before being married or not. I do think that it's supposed to be intimate and special, and when it happens it shouldn't just be one night, it should be part of... something. A bigger commitment. I told you I couldn't give you that and I shouldn't have been that guy last month.

The thing is, I think I could have been that guy, if things had been different. If I hadn't been about to leave and we'd taken a little more time and done things a little differently, maybe... the thing is, I really like you. I like that your smile seems so honest and that you get so excited about things. I think you're the first person I met when I came back to England who actually seemed to care about where I'd been or what I'd been doing while I was away. We had this connection when we met — chemistry, I guess — and if things had just been different...

The part I worry about is that I don't know if you had that in the back of your mind when all of this was going on, and that's why things ended up the way they did, or whether you just had a bit of a crush, and things still ended up the way they did. I worry because I don't really know you, and I don't know if you might go get a bit of a crush on some other bloke and end up in the same situation with someone who is all wrong for you, someone who couldn't ever be that guy even if things had been different, and I feel as though I've opened you up to this whole world of potential hurt and didn't stick around to ensure you had the tools to keep yourself from getting hurt.

Not that I can tell you any of that now, when we haven't spoken in weeks and you probably hate me.

With good reason. You ought to hate me. I took something you can't ever get back, and I didn't give you anything in return, and then I left.

I'm sorry.

J. A. D.

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Unsent!

The following 3 users Like J. Alfred Darrow's post:3 users Like J. Alfred Darrow's post
   Jupiter Smith, Lucinda Cavanaugh, Zelda Darrow

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

Mr. J. Alfred Darrow,

June 22nd

I don't know if you've been reading the news at home, but it's bad. Magic-ending fog, my inability to fix it, and then there was the troll. (I met the troll. I nearly died, but not as nearly as Mr. Adlard did. And if there was going to be any trouble, it was probably nixed by the troll.)

But, regardless. I read your book. I read your book and you should have told me how hard it was to, you know, survive. I hope you didn't engage in cannibalism, or anything similarly odd, as that's rather gruesome and would make your life even more difficult at parties.

You mentioned someone named L. in your book. I suppose that is the woman you mentioned having known once when I asked you, and I hope that that's all done, as the book leaves things rather open-ended and I wasn't sure if you ended up still engaged when you returned. I hope you understand my concern.

I also would like to emphasize that I'm not dead by troll. I'm actually supposed to be back at work tomorrow, given the national crisis. How's Avalon?

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Miss Z. Fisk

  

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AMAZING set by MJ

Not sent:

June 24th
Miss Zelda Fisk:
What are you talking about?

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Sent but not to Zelda:

24 June 1888
To Mr. H. Flynn, Obscurus Books, London;
I have heard through a third party that the editing of the book proceeded as scheduled and it has now been published. Much obliged for all your help thoroughout. Would you be so kind as to send my copy via owl at your earliest convenience? I am quite eager to see the finished product.

If I might impose upon you for a trivial favor, I wonder if you might also be so good as to send some recent Daily Prophet issues — perhaps a week's worth? We intend to be back in England presently and I should like to be apprised of current events before arriving. I hope you might have these papers handy, but if you are obliged to purchase them please feel free to do so at my expense.

Sincerely &tc.,
J. Alfred Darrow

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Unsent:

24 June
Miss Zelda Fisk,
There wasn't supposed to be anything about her in the book. I'm not sure what

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

25 June
Miss Zelda Fisk,
I haven't been following the news while abroad, and so your letter was both surprising and confusing; I apologize if my response, accordingly, doesn't seem to follow and hope you'll bear with me.

I am not a cannibal, nor am I engaged, and I'm very surprised indeed to find that the book left either of those two questions much in doubt. You asked me when we last met whether there was another woman, and it would have been rather difficult to answer that question truthfully while omitting something as momentous as an upcoming marriage. I can only assume from this that you believe I lied, which is not at all an unreasonable assumption on your part given the impropriety of my behavior at other times through the night. I should like to tell you that I am not nearly so much of a cad as you might believe me to be, and that what happened in April was both very much against my general character and very decidedly a mistake, but of course you have no particular reason to believe me. Actions speak louder than words, as they say, and I have ruined your opinion of my good character with actions and cannot hope to amend it with words.

I would have married you, if it had come down to it. Of course, you have no reason to believe that, either, and it is very easy to say so when the danger of it becoming necessary has passed (which I believe I gathered from your letter, though you didn't come out and say as much). I hope you weren't hurt too badly by the troll.

We return to London next week; I think news of Avalon can keep until then.
J. Alfred Darrow

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

Mr. J. Alfred Darrow,

June 26th

Right. Have you ever sent a letter and then immediately wanted to take it back? One could call that one of those letters. The reaction to your book has been a bit - one could say 'sensationalized,' if one wanted to. It appeared in Witch Weekly - (my sister reads it, & I saw your face on the cover, lest you think I am even more ridiculous than you no doubt think already) - and I felt rather silly for having been taken in by it.

I think you should know my behavior in April was rather out of character for me as well. You may have suspected that. I wanted to say it anyways. I also - and perhaps this does not make sense - would not want to have forced you into some sort of wandpoint marriage. I think that's how people end up unhappy. Don't you think?

I'll wait to hear of Avalon and the Ophelia. (I don't think I ever told you - Ophelia's my middle name. My mum was reading Hamlet when I was born.) I'm all patched up from the troll now, and back to the, erm, national crisis. I'm not really sure how to explain it without confusing you more. Should I send you the papers?

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Miss Z. Fisk

The following 1 user Likes Zelda Darrow's post:1 user Likes Zelda Darrow's post
   Jupiter Smith

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AMAZING set by MJ

27 June
Miss Zelda Fisk,
I don't tend to send those letters. I suppose I've gotten very good at not saying things.

I'm not surprised to hear that the book has been rather sensationalized, now that I've had a chance to look through the finished version. The whole thing is little more than lurid trash and I'm sorry if you wasted your time reading it. It seems my publisher had too much experience with penny dreadfuls and tried to follow the formula in this case as well, and while it seems to have been lucrative I cannot claim to be proud of the finished product.

We returned to London today, so no need to send any newspapers. I'll do my best to catch up.
J. Alfred Darrow

Postscript; I wasn't sure whether it wouldn't be better to let the discussion of 'wandpoint marriage' as you called it go without comment, since it's hardly a comfortable subject (particularly given how unacquainted with each other we truly are) and it can no longer be a relevant subject, but on reading over this letter it seems rather curt to just ignore it entirely, so in brief: I agree. I think those that marry in haste (for reasons of sentimentality or out of necessity) are often unhappy. I don't mean to imply anything about you or about myself, I hope you understand, in one direction or the other—only that this would hardly have been the ideal start to a lifelong commitment, had it taken that turn.

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The following 1 user Likes J. Alfred Darrow's post:1 user Likes J. Alfred Darrow's post
   Jupiter Smith

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

Mr. J. Alfred Darrow,

June 28th

If you want to see me, just to talk - let me know. I can come to anywhere in London; I've been working out of our office there and in Irvingly, mostly, so I can travel on the train.

I'd like to see you.

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Miss Z. Fisk

  

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AMAZING set by MJ

29 June
Miss Zelda
If you think that would--
Perhaps if--

Is there something we need to talk about or

I suppose if we meet somewhere then

I am currently splitting my time between the docks and the Museum, where they're going through the things we brought back with us from the voyage. If it wouldn't be too far out of your way, I could meet you there.
J. Alfred Darrow

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER

11 August, 1888
Hello!
The Voyager pulled in to Port Said yesterday and myself and the crew are at leisure until the Ministry types return from wherever they're escorting the gemstone to. I saw this in the bazaar yesterday and thought perhaps you'd like it. It's nothing much but it is pretty, and the vendor said it would help you sleep soundly if you wore it at night, so perhaps you'll find it useful. In light of recent events it might very well be illegal to transport anything enchanted from Egypt into England at the moment (the Ministry men on the ship have given everyone that impression, anyway, with how strict they've been regarding our days off here in Port Said), so please don't tell the Minister.
J. Alfred Darrow

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Enclosed: a silver glyph about the size of a charm for a charm bracelet, on a simple braided cord.

  

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MJ made the most Alfredy of sets and then two years later she made it EVEN BETTER