This all felt like a dream and Tony was afraid that things would start fading in the edges and he would wake up in his old bedroom in London, the one under his father’s roof. His neck hurt from looking around in wonder, even before the first years were admitted to the Great Hall. Once inside, Tony couldn’t contain a ”Wow!” at the charmed ceiling, made to look like the night sky.
As such, when after several other first years were sorted and his turn came, Tony felt stuck at the first question.
What is your most treasured memory?"
His brain has gone blank, unable to process any memory before all this as treasured. His life hadn’t been bad before, but it had also been bland and lonely. He’d lived a painfully ordinary life, with a strict father who expected him to study well and become a doctor like him one day. He didn’t even have memories of his mother, because she had died giving birth to him, something Tony could never shake away that it was his fault.
This, however, the magic, this new world, was by far the most exciting thing that had happened to him and he felt like his life was finally beginning now.
”I don’t have one now, but I know that I will in the years to come!” Tony replied truthfully in his mind, there was no point in pretending that any of his pre-magic life was at all treasured because it was expected to offer an answer from his past.
"Who knows you best, and why?"
The second question was a tricky one as well. Tony had never had to think so deeply about himself before! Once again, his head went blank. Although he had many friends, he didn’t feel like any of them knew him that well. The family front was bleak as well; his father and sister were distant, his step-mother cordial enough but it was clear she loved her own son more, his half-brother an unpleasant brat. Then came his current caregiver, his Aunt, who had shown him more love and attention from his point of view, but was still something of a stranger to him.
”Myself,” Tony replied to the voice in his head. ”Only I know what is going on in my head, what my needs and desires are. Other people could only make a guess but they would see me from their point of view, so their opinion could diverge from the truth.” An older and more mature Anthony Lawrence might have pondered over for one can not know his true self either, as it was a matter of perception as well.
"How would you describe yourself?"
The next question came as an excellent follow up to his previous answer and Tony was overcome with a sense of guilt. Because as much as he could describe himself, as curious and book-loving, there was always an underlying sense of guilt. For killing his mother with his birth, for, ultimately, being a freak. He was so excited about being a wizard of, course, but the words his father had spoken about that were still an open wound in him.
But this time, Tony didn’t want to admit the truth to the voice, show all the ugliness. He wanted to show that he had it all together. ”My Aunt tells me I am a scholar in the making and I agree. I love learning new things. I would also consider myself friendly and considerate of others.”
His answer hadn’t been given as readily, because although Tony did love reading and learning stuff, he felt somewhat guilty to talk well about himself. What he didn’t want to tell the Voice was that he was a failure, his mother’s killer, a freak and a burden.
"Describe your perfect day from start to finish."
Finally, a question where he wouldn’t have to probe deep into his psyche and process uncomfortable emotions! He perked up in his seat as he began to describe his perfect day: ”Oh I would have my classes and learn so many things about magic and then I would practice it with my friends - with Miss Hyacinth and Mr. Gallivan I met on the boat! I will go to the creatures pen and pet a unicorn, and then make a hippogryph trust me! And after that, I will learn how to brew healing potions and make someone healthy again! And after that me and my friends could even defeat dark wizards!” After he finished describing his day which would likely need 72-hours for him to accomplish all that, another light hearted question followed:
"What class are you most excited about? Why?"
”Potions!” was Tony’s immediate answer, because he wanted to make Professor Valenduris, his first contact in the magical world proud, and also because Healers used potions. ”But I also want to learn more about magical creatures… And how to use my wand! Oh, don’t make me pick just one, I am excited for all of them!” He had big plans to brew healing potions, tend magical creatures and defeat evil wizards, so he’d need a well rounded education.
As such, when after several other first years were sorted and his turn came, Tony felt stuck at the first question.
What is your most treasured memory?"
His brain has gone blank, unable to process any memory before all this as treasured. His life hadn’t been bad before, but it had also been bland and lonely. He’d lived a painfully ordinary life, with a strict father who expected him to study well and become a doctor like him one day. He didn’t even have memories of his mother, because she had died giving birth to him, something Tony could never shake away that it was his fault.
This, however, the magic, this new world, was by far the most exciting thing that had happened to him and he felt like his life was finally beginning now.
”I don’t have one now, but I know that I will in the years to come!” Tony replied truthfully in his mind, there was no point in pretending that any of his pre-magic life was at all treasured because it was expected to offer an answer from his past.
"Who knows you best, and why?"
The second question was a tricky one as well. Tony had never had to think so deeply about himself before! Once again, his head went blank. Although he had many friends, he didn’t feel like any of them knew him that well. The family front was bleak as well; his father and sister were distant, his step-mother cordial enough but it was clear she loved her own son more, his half-brother an unpleasant brat. Then came his current caregiver, his Aunt, who had shown him more love and attention from his point of view, but was still something of a stranger to him.
”Myself,” Tony replied to the voice in his head. ”Only I know what is going on in my head, what my needs and desires are. Other people could only make a guess but they would see me from their point of view, so their opinion could diverge from the truth.” An older and more mature Anthony Lawrence might have pondered over for one can not know his true self either, as it was a matter of perception as well.
"How would you describe yourself?"
The next question came as an excellent follow up to his previous answer and Tony was overcome with a sense of guilt. Because as much as he could describe himself, as curious and book-loving, there was always an underlying sense of guilt. For killing his mother with his birth, for, ultimately, being a freak. He was so excited about being a wizard of, course, but the words his father had spoken about that were still an open wound in him.
But this time, Tony didn’t want to admit the truth to the voice, show all the ugliness. He wanted to show that he had it all together. ”My Aunt tells me I am a scholar in the making and I agree. I love learning new things. I would also consider myself friendly and considerate of others.”
His answer hadn’t been given as readily, because although Tony did love reading and learning stuff, he felt somewhat guilty to talk well about himself. What he didn’t want to tell the Voice was that he was a failure, his mother’s killer, a freak and a burden.
"Describe your perfect day from start to finish."
Finally, a question where he wouldn’t have to probe deep into his psyche and process uncomfortable emotions! He perked up in his seat as he began to describe his perfect day: ”Oh I would have my classes and learn so many things about magic and then I would practice it with my friends - with Miss Hyacinth and Mr. Gallivan I met on the boat! I will go to the creatures pen and pet a unicorn, and then make a hippogryph trust me! And after that, I will learn how to brew healing potions and make someone healthy again! And after that me and my friends could even defeat dark wizards!” After he finished describing his day which would likely need 72-hours for him to accomplish all that, another light hearted question followed:
"What class are you most excited about? Why?"
”Potions!” was Tony’s immediate answer, because he wanted to make Professor Valenduris, his first contact in the magical world proud, and also because Healers used potions. ”But I also want to learn more about magical creatures… And how to use my wand! Oh, don’t make me pick just one, I am excited for all of them!” He had big plans to brew healing potions, tend magical creatures and defeat evil wizards, so he’d need a well rounded education.