This was a trap, she realized. He was doing all of this on purpose not because he was going to kiss her again, but because he was trying to goad her into kissing him — that, or at least to come out and plainly ask him to kiss her. This was clever, in a conniving and infuriating sort of way, she had to give him that. Because if it worked, then whatever happened next would be her fault, not his. He'd set her up for this, with his refusal to put a shirt on when she'd asked and grabbing her wrist and standing too close to her, with kissing her — he'd gotten her flustered and disoriented and now he was leading her to a path and telling her to take the first step. But she didn't know where this path led, and she'd never walked it before, and no matter how much he invaded her personal space, she wasn't going to take that step.

"I'm going home," she said tersely. Her cheeks were burning again but this time it was at least half from anger. She let go of the counter and pushed past him, not caring if she answered his question or not.

The following 1 user Likes Juliana Ainsworth's post:1 user Likes Juliana Ainsworth's post
   Kieran Abernathy

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Prof. Marlowe Forfang

Jules

She pushed past him and fled into the hall, and for a moment he considered just standing there and letting her go. It was fine, he tried to tell himself; maybe he'd been mistaken and maybe she was right. Maybe he was just hoping that she wanted to kiss him as much as he'd wanted to kiss her in that moment, and he'd gone and upset her in his attempt to figure it out. Maybe he was ruining whatever "everything" was, because he felt an ache in his chest as the sound of her footsteps disappeared down the hall. He took a deep breath and turned on his feel, following her.

"Wait," he said. He entered the living room just as she was nearing the fireplace, and he took another deep breath, "Juliana, wait."

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— way too attractive set by mj <3 —

"No," she said firmly as he followed her back into the parlor. She was already at the fireplace and he was only at the edge of the room, and she wanted him to stay there, away from her. She raised her right and and jabbed one accusing finger in his direction. "You don't get to do that. You can't call me Juliana," she insisted. "This isn't — we're not — we're not going to fall into bed together," she said harshly. "I didn't come over tonight because I had some — some burning desire to see your — your stupid chest. I have worked so hard to fix everything, after that ordeal in the garden, and I have — I have splattered people's secrets on the pages of Witch Weekly and started rumors about a presumably innocent teen girl and I — I may have ruined someone's marriage, for all I know," she continued, frantic at this point. She had never interacted with either Reuben Crouch or Melody Finch personally, but she didn't really believe that the woman was on her deathbed (she didn't think, anyway). Surely neither of them would take kindly to the insinuation in her latest letter that Mr. Crouch was off flirting with his former flames hoping that she would die. Not that Jules had given the matter a second thought, before sending it in — because if that was what it took to get things back on track, she was willing to sacrifice the feelings of someone she didn't know. If it meant restoring her mother's place in society and getting back her regular society invitations, she would do it without hesitation. But now —

"I can't — I can't have done all of that just for Marianne Finch to be right," she admitted in a burst of frustration. "I am not going to — to kiss you or — fall for you or — or whatever it is you want from me. We're not — you can't call me Juliana," she concluded with a huff, crossing her arms heavily over her chest. She was still wearing his coat, she realized, but she wasn't going to end that little speech by stripping it off while he watched.

"Goodbye," she said, reaching for the floo powder.

The following 1 user Likes Juliana Ainsworth's post:1 user Likes Juliana Ainsworth's post
   Kieran Abernathy

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Prof. Marlowe Forfang

Jules

He fell quiet for once, and actually listened to her speak. He felt a pang of sympathy in his chest, and suddenly he understood what she'd meant when she'd accused him of ruining everything—it was not their relationship (though that seemed to be in jeopardy) or even whatever plan she was working on behind the scenes. He was ruining all the efforts she'd done to disprove Mrs. Finch, because he was proving her right by kissing her.

"Jul—Miss Binns," he corrected himself, though the formality seemed too stiff. "I don't want you to leave thinking that I planned all of this. I'm not - I'm not trying to get you in bed, or to get you to kiss me. I didn't - none that was intended to happen," he said, taking a step forward hesitantly. She was on the edge already, and the last thing he wanted was for her to disappear through the fireplace with wrong assumptions about him floating around her head.

"But it did happen and I - I'm sorry it upset you. I'm sorry I kissed you." He told himself he wouldn't apologize for that, but he was doing it right now. He wasn't truly sorry, but she was, and that sucked away any passing pleasure he might have taken from it.

She reached for the floo powder, and Lachlan's heart jumped in his chest. "Juliana, please." He'd said it again, but he didn't care—she was going to go, and not only was he going to lose her as an acquaintance, but she was going to go on writing things that were clearly upsetting her without telling him, and he still didn't know what the complication she'd mention in the letter was about, and the thought of her leaving made his chest tighten.

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— way too attractive set by mj <3 —

That was a rather important piece at the heart of things: whether or not he had intended it. That was why she'd asked the question she did, when he'd finally stepped back and given her a moment to think it through. She'd asked why he did it, and if he'd come out and said I think you're attractive and I'd like to sleep with you or if he had gone exactly the other way and said he fancied marrying her for some unknowable reason, at least it would have been a known variable, something she could have worked around in her internal calculus of the situation. The answer that he'd given her was one of uncertainty, of impulses and inarticulate feelings.

"That's — that's so much worse," she pointed out, voice wavering. "Don't you see that? Because I didn't plan this, either. I wasn't going to come here tonight and I certainly didn't have any plans to — to —" she left off with a frustrated sigh, unable to articulate exactly what it was she hadn't thought would happen. All of this, really. She didn't really know what her endgame had been, when she'd flooed over, and that was the entire point.

"But if neither of us are planning this — if neither of us are in control, then who's — who's going to stop it?" she said, bordering on hysterics.

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   Kieran Abernathy, Lachlan MacFusty

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Prof. Marlowe Forfang

Jules

He felt like there was a break in the conversation, and he could have started towards her to get her away from the floo network, but instead he placed his hand on the arm of the couch and, keeping her eyes on her, walked around and sat down on the edge looking up at her. If one thing was clear by now it was that Juliana Binns was a woman who was ruled by her mind, and Lach was a man ruled by his heart. She was good at solving problems, finding answers, figuring things out—but Lachlan realized right then and there that she wasn't as in touch with her emotions, or emotions in general.

"But that's the thing," he said in a quiet voice, "There are some things that you're not supposed to try to control. You can't problem-solve your way out of your feelings or desires, Juliana. That only makes them worse." He'd spent the last year struggling to work through everything—the very public accidental manslaughter and the fallout, the nearly killing his sister, his near-death experience in the arctic, Fallon's betrayal and the subsequent heartbreak. Eventually he'd learned just to let the feelings pass; sometimes it led to days on end where he felt like shit, but it was better than trying to bottle them up.

"I'm not saying you have to kiss me, but I'm saying that you don't have to plan your reactions like you would next week's schedule. Sometimes things just - happen, and you don't have to treat it like a miscalculation in your plans." Because she did have a habit of trying to plan for every little detail. The first time she'd came to his house and he'd questioned her about her plans, she'd had every aspect covered. "I - I didn't intend to kiss you—or any of it, really—because that's a strange thing to go into a situation intending to do. I don't know how I would eve try to plan that. It just happened."

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   Kieran Abernathy

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— way too attractive set by mj <3 —

"Well — ensure it doesn't happen again," she shot back. This was decidedly unkind, but the track this conversation had taken had unnerved her. He was sitting down and talking quietly, and she felt as though he wanted to lure her into doing the same. Not consciously, maybe — she did not think he was acting maliciously, after everything they'd said — but all the same he might want her to sit, to relax, to stay. All of that was dangerous, because none of what he was saying answered her question. If he was just acting on impulses and she was getting carried away with herself and ending up in places she had never intended to be, who was the adult in the room? Who was going to prevent them from doing something stupid and terrible? This was why chaperones existed, she suddenly realized. What a grand irony that she was only truly in need of one once everyone had written her off as too undesirable to get into any trouble.

"I'm going home," she insisted firmly. "And I don't want you to write me and I won't be visiting again."

  

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Prof. Marlowe Forfang

Jules

She did not want to be here. He got the message well enough. He felt a wave of disappointment was over him, followed by anger—but not at her. No, he was angry for putting himself in this situation altogether. He'd kissed her and now she was cutting him off, and - well, he guessed he deserved it. He knew how she could be, how intolerant she was of his emotions, so rather than look at her and give her the chance to see the way her words hurt him he stared blankly off to the side, keeping his expression neutral although he knew he would be hurting he moment she walked through the fireplace.

"Go," he said, barely loud enough for her to hear.

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   Juliana Ainsworth

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— way too attractive set by mj <3 —