He knew Monty wasn’t stupid, and that last remark was a little flattering, and much as Monty pretended not to care Ishmael knew how much he did... and this was still a terrible idea, but it was to Monty’s credit that Ishmael was even opening up the debate again.
He wouldn’t have, for anyone else.
“You didn’t know me back then,” Ishmael countered, running his fingers over the nape of Monty’s neck in an unthinking caress, and winding his hand gently into Monty’s hair, not sure which of them he was trying to soothe. “You’ll make a mess of everything.” Everything they had built here, all their habits and routines; living in London would be near-impossible, if they were to avoid the law. And their dynamic would change, entirely. Ishmael would have to clean up all those inevitable messes. He was sure Monty had thought about their future before proposing it; but it was still more commitment than Monty knew.
“And if you regretted it,” Ishmael said, hushed, “you’d always blame me.” And then all of this would be dust and ruin.
He wouldn’t have, for anyone else.
“You didn’t know me back then,” Ishmael countered, running his fingers over the nape of Monty’s neck in an unthinking caress, and winding his hand gently into Monty’s hair, not sure which of them he was trying to soothe. “You’ll make a mess of everything.” Everything they had built here, all their habits and routines; living in London would be near-impossible, if they were to avoid the law. And their dynamic would change, entirely. Ishmael would have to clean up all those inevitable messes. He was sure Monty had thought about their future before proposing it; but it was still more commitment than Monty knew.
“And if you regretted it,” Ishmael said, hushed, “you’d always blame me.” And then all of this would be dust and ruin.
