Dionisia made sure to sit with her back turned the rest of the room and propped her elbow up so she could lean her cheek against her palm. It wasn't a foolproof way to keep her identity hidden from any prying eyes, but it made her feel more secure.
Unfortunately that feeling disappeared the moment she settled in. Her heart dropped into her stomach, and she felt her chest tighten uncomfortably. She stared at him wordlessly, her mouth parted in surprise, and she only closed it once she began to realize how long it was taking her to respond.
She wanted to tell him that he should be sorry, that she'd risked a lot to allow him to have contact with Elliott. She'd lied to her husband—she'd let Zelda think less of her. Of course she hadn't done it entirely for Elliott; she was also angry that he'd abandoned her. He owed her nothing, but for those brief few months when he'd visited it had felt like she wasn't entirely alone, that she'd had someone who saw her.
But here and now, while they were both drinking away their feelings and all that time had passed, she only gave a sad little smile and a nod. "You had a baby, a new family to worry about," she said, acknowledging it aloud for the first time to him. It's what she'd told herself all those months, when she still half-expected him to suddenly write one month and ask to see Elliott. She could understand that. She'd told herself she could.
Unfortunately that feeling disappeared the moment she settled in. Her heart dropped into her stomach, and she felt her chest tighten uncomfortably. She stared at him wordlessly, her mouth parted in surprise, and she only closed it once she began to realize how long it was taking her to respond.
She wanted to tell him that he should be sorry, that she'd risked a lot to allow him to have contact with Elliott. She'd lied to her husband—she'd let Zelda think less of her. Of course she hadn't done it entirely for Elliott; she was also angry that he'd abandoned her. He owed her nothing, but for those brief few months when he'd visited it had felt like she wasn't entirely alone, that she'd had someone who saw her.
But here and now, while they were both drinking away their feelings and all that time had passed, she only gave a sad little smile and a nod. "You had a baby, a new family to worry about," she said, acknowledging it aloud for the first time to him. It's what she'd told herself all those months, when she still half-expected him to suddenly write one month and ask to see Elliott. She could understand that. She'd told herself she could.
