Dempsey had been the smarter one of them in more recent times and again Dean had to let him. He pushed back on the wall and stepped back, running a shaky hand through his hair. Merlin he wished this wasn't so hard.

"My life is pretty ruined without you." He knew it wasn't fair to say, but it was the truth. Dean knew he'd been the one to end things, and he still regretted it. He'd been able to pick up the pieces and make it look good, but there was always something missing. Dean hadn't found it at the bottom of a bottle, nor any of the foreign countries he fled to, nor in the unfamiliar bodies he took to bed. He was always chasing this and every time he managed to catch hold, it slipped right through his fingers.