Daff flinched when he pushed back from the table, and the tears immediately began to fall. She didn't know what else to say to get him to understand. "I don't know what else to tell you; I was wrong; I shouldn't have gone; I told you because you deserve to know, and I know it might change everything, but I promised you I would and so I did." She was crying in earnest now, hands shaking as she tried to muster up anything she could think to add that would help. She had this miserable twist in her chest that felt sort of like she was suffocating. She was losing him because she just couldn't leave well enough alone. Ignoring the letter would have been the right choice, she knew that, but she hadn't and now this is what it had gotten her. She'd just laid everything else out on the table and she still couldn't get it right.

Daff did know she didn't want to talk about Noble anymore, this was her fault and she desperately wanted to fix it somehow. "He didn't really tell me." There had never been a straight answer, when you love someone you should tell them was not a good enough reason, not when there was more at stake than ever before. Daff hadn't known Noble could be so selfish and she didn't want to be a part of that.

It felt strange to be sitting when he wasn't but Daff wasn't sure she could stand without wobbling or getting dizzy. "And it does not matter, Elias. I am where I want to be." Even if she kept making things harder. She would choose this over whatever unknown possibility any day. How many times had she told him that she loved him unlike anyone else before? What else could she do to get him to understand that? Daff was many things, but she was not careless with words. She had never lied to him, ever. She sniffled back some of the tears and pushed slowly to her feet. Her knees were a little shaky, but she wasn't dizzy. She wasn't brave enough to go more than a step or two toward him though, hands curled around her belly for something real, something meaningful to hold onto. "And I will do whatever you want me to that shows that. I'm sorry I haven't done a very good job of that lately, but please let me try."