"I saw a man die, Victor," Jasper replied with a trembling voice and entered deeper into the room. He stood before a chair but instead of sitting down, he grabbed onto its back.
After saying that, he was hit by the realization that he'd seen someone die. He'd seen something horrible and bloody and irreversible. He'd seen something that only happened in the literature of the macabre, in front of his eyes and he'd been unable to stop it. No, he'd been useless, because in hindsight, there were many things he, a grown man with a full magical education at Hogwarts could have done.
He wished there was a way to go back in time and use his knowledge of how things had played out to stop it. He would have taken his wand out immediately and cast Expelliarmus on the knife. He would have used Stupefy on the man if need be, to make him stop hurting himself.
He was angry with himself and that didn't make his crying better. He was crying now, forcefully and uncontrollably and the embarrassment he felt, at the back of his mind, for being a grown man crying, wasn't enough punishment for his inaction.
After saying that, he was hit by the realization that he'd seen someone die. He'd seen something horrible and bloody and irreversible. He'd seen something that only happened in the literature of the macabre, in front of his eyes and he'd been unable to stop it. No, he'd been useless, because in hindsight, there were many things he, a grown man with a full magical education at Hogwarts could have done.
He wished there was a way to go back in time and use his knowledge of how things had played out to stop it. He would have taken his wand out immediately and cast Expelliarmus on the knife. He would have used Stupefy on the man if need be, to make him stop hurting himself.
He was angry with himself and that didn't make his crying better. He was crying now, forcefully and uncontrollably and the embarrassment he felt, at the back of his mind, for being a grown man crying, wasn't enough punishment for his inaction.