Sent to Thomas Montgomery (Billie Farrow)
(It's not the first she's sent. It won't be the last.)

1st 4th 7th January, 1890

My darling Thomas,

Happy New Year! Forgive me for being late, but how was your Christmas? Did you spend it with your father and his parents, or at school? I'm sorry I didn't write, then. But I suppose you are back to school now at any rate — and wondrously busy, no doubt. Much too busy to have time for me, I know!

I'm sure Christmas is not any of our favourite time of year, know it must be hard over the holidays

Or maybe you've quite forgotten me, maybe you're glad that I'm not there.

I am sure Irvingly looks positively quaint, this time of year. And Hogwarts too. You don't have to believe me, but I made a wish for us at Christmas, and on New Year's. I thought of you so often. I am always thinking about you.

I will always be

your loving mother,
Ester

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15th January, 1890

Thomas,

I've made a resolution, you know, for this year. I shall be better, you see. I shall be an entirely new person, until I have changed my life for the better - until everyone has forgotten all the bad in me, until I have scrubbed away every flaw. 

I need you to write to me, though. I need you to try to love me, if I am to keep to such a promise. You must at least acknowledge me! You can't imagine how hard it will be for me, otherwise. You have to speak to me, or I shall hardly bother.

Tell me you will. Whether you like it or not, I am still

your mother.

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The following 1 user Likes Ester Montgomery's post:1 user Likes Ester Montgomery's post
   Billie Farrow

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16th January, 1890

My lovely boy,

I didn't mean that, in my last letter! I don't deserve anything of you, I understand that. I have no right to ask anything from you until I prove myself, and no right to even call myself your mother when I have been so faithless in my duties. Please forget what I said.

You see, I will be better this year, and I will stick to it whether I hear a word from you or not, whether you have any faith in me or not. That is what makes a resolution, after all.

I only want to make you proud, Thomas darling. I miss you, and I love you, and I live for the day when I do not make you ashamed of my existence. 

I hope, one day, that you will see me again as

your loving mother,
Ester

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