October 13, 1889

Dearest Journal,

After last week one would think I would know better than to open the pages of Witch Weekly. But I have forgotten to suspend my subscription. I shall have to write to them immediately to cease receiving such mail. If I had any lingering fondness toward the publication I no longer do. I am now listed among ‘Five Society Women to Stay Away From’ as is Dear Minta. They may drag my name through the dirt, but I can not abide their actions toward my cousins - either of them. Bella and Minta are simply looking to live their lives as happily as possible. Shouldn’t all ladies be allowed to dream of a happy ending? While Bella has indeed had her misfortunes our dear Minta should not have to suffer for them. They are two very different young ladies and to be judged by one’s sister (or cousin) is the height of unfairness.

I knew there would be damage to my cousins for my actions, I admitted so when I wrote to them on my honeymoon, but I had not thought it to be so … blasphemous. I so wish to write them but I suspect my letters would only be spurned upon arrival. Afterall, even my smallest interactions are reported such as my visit to Diagon Alley. They would likely suspect even their mail being intercepted and read!

I am grateful that it simply printed Bella and I’s meeting not my own actions toward the boggart. But again, I find myself wondering, why actions such as fear of a dragon are not more noted upon than a conversation with my own cousin? Does our society so value scandal that it has entirely lost sense of its own decency.

Ace assures me that I should not put faith into such publications as Witch Weekly, that it does not reflect the words of society, but I know this to be untrue. Who among our set does not read Witch Weekly? Does not consider it might even have a grain of truth to it? But I should abide by my husband’s wishes and pay no mind to it - after all, I am in mourning and hidden from society anyway.

Despite Witch Weekly’s campaign against me, I find that I still do not repent my actions. I love my husband with all my heart and I would not deny us our happy ending.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

October 16, 1889

Dearest Journal,

Today is the first social call I shall make since my marriage - and mother’s death. I know that I should not be participating in anything social because of my mourning period, but I doubt that seeing family is considered impolite by society. I can not see how mother would resent me calling on my sister in law almost a month after she was gone. She always knew how much I loved to see people and I do not think this will have passed as she watches me from Heaven.

Odd to think that Mrs. Avril Nott is now my sister. The former Miss Lukeson, as I always think of her, was a few years below me at school and in a different house. Beyond knowing of her and knowing her to be in my social sphere I did not interact with her much. Now she has extended in invitation to take tea with her. I suppose I should not be surprised by this as I did attend her wedding, although to be perfectly fair - most of upper society did, but she is also my new sister.

I had always hoped when I married to have a sister, but now that I find myself with this fair feminine delight I find myself worried if she will accept me as such. She already has three sisters of blood and two others by marriage. What am I other than just another woman in her life? She will already have such a close bond with Ace’s sisters, that I doubt I can penetrate into that sacred circle and call myself a sister as well. Instead I believe I shall always remain simply a relation by marriage.

Perhaps this is the reason I find myself nervous for such a meeting. Although I do not think the fact that we have hardly ever exchanged more than a few pleasantries in conversation is helping the matter. I dare not admit such worries to Ace for he shall tell me they are unfounded - and I shall seem the most ungrateful to someone who is lifting me from the doldrums of the Lukeson House.

I shall report the events of this afternoon to you faithfully, dearest journal, tomorrow when I have had some time to reflect. For Ace shall be home upon my return to the townhouse and I do so wish to spend the evening with my dear husband.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

October 17, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I must admit that I feel rather foolish looking over what I wrote yesterday. Mrs. Avril Nott was perfectly sweet to me and we rather enjoyed our tea. Indeed conversation hardly lacked at all. While she is neither Nora nor Helga, perhaps I might find a new friend in the young lady. I look forward to spending more time with her in the future. While I do not think she will think of me as a blood sister any time soon, I do hope that we shall have a wonderful relationship in the coming years. For a friendship may be as beautiful as a sisterly bond - at least as my own experience has taught me. For Bella and I were more like sisters than Bella and Minty - at least that is how I have always felt. Not that I would dare admit that to Minty.

I did find out that recently Mrs. Nott and her husband, Mr. Warwick Nott, bought their own townhouse in London. I suspect it is because Mrs. Nott wanted to remain near her family. I can hardly fault her for such a belief. Had I as close a family as it seems to me the Lukesons are I too would loath to be away from my family. As conversation yesterday surrounded this reminded me yet again of the Flint Townhouse.

I had originally thought to speak to my husband about the matter, but then convinced myself that perhaps it would be better to keep it to myself. To hold onto the secret until such a time as I could present it as a surprise for him. A gift so to speak. Perhaps it might even be a home of our own one day? Such were my thoughts, but then I allowed myself to push it aside in my own endeavors to keep busy. Besides, I begin to doubt if Ace would even want a home of our own. His mother seems to depend on him terribly much and I do think that he would not want to be far from her while she is still recovering from her ordeal. But again perhaps Ace is of the same mind as myself and wishes to one day have a home of our own? The only way to find out, I suppose, is to speak to him about such things. I do wish to know more of the house before I do. All I have been left with are memories as dusty as the sheets on the furniture in the house. I have, therefore, decided to visit the Townhouse in the coming days to determine the state of it. Then, depending on what I have found, I shall speak to Ace of it and what he thinks we should do with it.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

October 22, 1889

Dearest Journal,

It took a week to arrange it, but I was able to have a set of servants from the Flint Mansion reopen the Flint Townhouse for me to see the place. They were kind enough to air the rooms out for me and to remove the sheets. In fact the week in which they worked on the house has left quite a favorable impression upon myself.

It was strange, at first, I’ll admit, to walk through the rooms. To think that the last time they had been used my mother had been smiling and happy. So different than I remember her being. I have memories of her, flashing a smile, rounding a corner, the jewel toned colors of her skirts disappearing around corners of the house. It was almost as if I were chasing a portrait through the house. Indeed, I suppose in some ways I was. There were portraits of both mother and father in the Townhouse. My mother looks so young in her’s, her eyes so full of mischief when she spoke to me. My father’s only looked to brood upon the world. He didn’t say much, but what I felt was that I was so inadequate that I would never have lived up to his expectations had he lived. Mother’s portrait wasn’t chatty, but she didn’t keep quite like father’s did.

The layout was much like what I remembered. I had almost thought I had dreamed it up, all those years ago. But I remembered each turn and hall as if I had only been there a few years ago. It almost felt as if I were rediscovering a lost friend. I found my own nursery, and where I would hide to watch the dancing at balls. I even remember my nanny once sitting beside me watching the adults. Strange to think that I was recently one of those adults. That perhaps one day I shall have a child of my own who sneaks off to watch my own dancing at a ball that I host.

I think Ace would be happy with the Flint House and as such I have instructed several servants to remain behind and open the house again. I have given them a month ready the place before I show Ace. It shall make for such a grand surprise. I can hardly wait to see what his reaction will be.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 1, 1889

Dearest Journal,

Looking back on my entries to you the past few weeks I admit I am a bit ashamed as it appears all I have left you with is impressions of my own boredom. That is not to say that it is not true, nor is it to say that I do not love my life. For a really do not regret my decision to marry my husband and I would not change it for the entire world. But I seem to have given you the impression that I long for things to do and am discontent with my lot in life. It is therefore with a great amount of cheerfulness that I report to you today that the past week or so I have been anything but bored. In fact I have more often than not found myself with too little time than too much - even when Ace is away at work.

All these extra projects I have taken on have been vying for my attention as well as my duties at the owner of Flint Manor. When mother passed on I thought that managing the manor from afar would be little to no challenge, now I find my days taken up with letters, reports, and decisions to be made. I did not realize the full extent of these duties until Mr. Hughes, laid them before me a few weeks ago. Even then I had not set much time aside to work on such things until matters plied up and had to be dealt with the past week or two. I now find that it occupies most of my time.

I have also found on occasion that I have traveled to Flint Townhouse several times to check on their progress. I have instructed for several modern updates to be put in and have been told that the house should be ready to open in three to four weeks. The progress that has been made in the past week, however, is promising that it shall be sooner than that.

In fact with all the conversation I have left you with of houses and property I’ve hardly time to consider what has become of my embroidery. I have finished one hand cherif and have traced out the design for a second one. I’ve been asking Ace about such things and subtly as I can as far as he has mentioned it will be a most appropriate gift for him. Now I shall only hope that I have it completed prior to Christmas day.

I would tell you more of the going ons of the Lukeson Home but alas another owl is here with letters from Flint Mansion and I really sure response promptly.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 4, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I do not believe I ever expected that running Flint Manor would take up so much of my time. I’ve tried to remember mother running the estate and often I simply remember other things about her. Like how when she felt ill she would spend days locked in her rooms resting, or how when she would respond to letters they always seemed to be from her friends and not our servants. I suppose this perception comes from the fact that mother lived at the estate most of the time and rather than having to direct the servants over letters she could simply meet with them. She did not need to direct cook to purchase extra goods for a visit because she was not visiting she lived there. Nor did mother need to settle disputes among the villagers over letter because she lived on the land and could meet with them. I am surprised I did not notice then how very much she did and how many people she met with, but it is the only way I can see her having done as much as I feel I am often doing.

While I have no wish to return home to Flint Manor, I have begun to wonder if it might be simpler to return there and run things properly rather than through letters. I had hoped to surprise Ace with the Flint Townhouse so we might make a life there for ourselves, as memories of mother and my previous lift haunt the very hallways of Flint Manor. But with all I’ve been involved in I almost feel as if returning to the estate might be the best way to go about things. I do not want to give up the idea of the townhouse, however, and have wondered if perhaps we might spend the social season there and the rest of the year at the manor? Once the townhouse is ready I shall brave the conversation with Ace. Then I shall need to brave the memories that live there and the memory of the unhappy girl I was when I lived there. Perhaps Ace and I might find a way to breathe new life into the manor and make it ours, drive out the memories that linger from my father’s day and once again make it a happy home.

There is much to think on, dear journal, and you have always helped me do such.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 6, 1889

Dearest Journal,

There is a small parlor which I have claimed as my own. I don’t mean to say I’ve mentioned this to anyone, or that I actually have a room here in the Lukeson house. No, rather what I mean is that I had begun thinking of it as my own as no one uses it and I have begun to spend my hours there. It is tucked into the back of the house on the first floor and is decorated with beautiful greens and golds. It reminds me of the gardens back home. There is plenty of light to embroider by and it even has a pretty little desk to write at. I’ve taken to writing my correspondence to Flint Manor there, as well as composing my entries to you, dearest friend.

Yesterday as I was working on the hand cherifs for Ace when Mrs. Lukeson looked in on me. I admit, I was rather afraid she had come to claim the room back. That I was to be turned out of the room for some future company, but Mrs. Lukeson was kind about it, and, while rather awkward (one day I do hope that our interactions are less awkward, I assume this has to do with her own experiences in life less so than me - although I could hardly blame her if it were myself, after all, I did plunge her family into rather a dreadful scandal) allowed me to ‘host’ her in the parlor. We even took tea and I admit that I did rather enjoy my afternoon.

The whole afternoon made me wonder how Mrs. Lukeson might have treated me if I had been engaged properly to her son before our marriage rather than having been engaged to another previously and then running off with her son? I wonder if she would have helped me plan the wedding, if she would have wanted any say at all. Would mother and her have enjoyed suppers together planning what Ace’s and I’s life would look like when they were done with us? If mother had passed away first would she have taken on the role of mother? Did she wish for Ace to find a wife that she might consider a daughter of her own? I was so wrapped up in my own life, in my own dread of the circumstances, of my love for Ace that I hardly stopped to think how she might feel about the whole thing. I suppose I assumed that she, like everyone else, would think of foolhardy and naive. But would she, had we let her know?

I am not brave enough to ask Ace, or Mrs. Lukeson, but perhaps with time I shall be.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 8, 1889

Dearest Journal,

There are times when one simply must get out of the house. Today was one of those days. I simply could bear the thought of answering a single letter more toward the management of Flint Manor. Nor did I find myself interested in occupying myself with embroidery. Indeed, I admit to feeling rather like I simply had to go and do something. I had thought to look in at the Flint House and see how work was progressing there, then I thought I might go to Diagon Alley to visit the bakery I occasion on my visits there. I have been craving one of their cakes all weekend and could think of no better excuse than to purchase one. I could almost smell the cake in my mere thoughts. Both these reasons were enough to get me out of the house.

I took the Lukeson coach to Flint House first and was delighted to see that the requests I had made were well under well. Indeed I think I shall be able to show Ace the house sooner than I had originally hoped. The servants have taken all of sheets off in the downstairs room and begun to clear and polish all the surfaces and furniture. They assured me they would start on the upstairs rooms next. When I first visited I had noted that the main suite of the house, which had once been my parents’ had been dready and out of date, decorated in reds and blacks. I requested that they redecorate the room using light blues and silvers. The housekeeper, Mrs. Mills, had laid out swatches of fabric for my approval when I arrived. They were all very beautiful and it was hard to choose only one. In the end she was able to incorporate several into the bedlinens and new coverings for the chairs. I also instructed that they replace the wallpaper with something airier and lighter and she had samples for this as well. I suspect this room shall take most of the time to complete.

After I visited the Flint House we drove to Diagon Alley and I was able to order a small cake. It almost melted in my mouth, indeed it seemed most indulgent. I even bought one for Ace to surprise him with this evening. Perhaps, also, to satisfy my own sweet tooth.

On our way home we passed by Crowdy Memorial Library of Writing & Witchcraft. I have never much been interested in libraries, as you well know, but if it struck me that as I now live in London and have on occasion simply needed an excuse to leave the house, that this might be precisely the type of place I might wish to find myself.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 11, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I am so terribly embarrassed. I stopped by the Ministry of Magic to surprise Ace with lunch, having no sense of just how large the Ministry is. I did stop by a Welcome Witch to ask directions but then found myself dreadfully lost no sooner than I had taken my leave of her. A very peculiar man, and I say this regarding not only his behavior but also this clothing and his companion (a monkey!), came to my rescue. He treated me almost as if I were a niece of his and was kind enough to help me find Ace. I will admit that however grateful I am to him for finding Ace’s office and reuniting myself with my husband, I was grateful to be out of his presence. It was not so much the man himself that offended, but rather the monkey and the monkey’s food. The monkey seemed to take a great dislike to be from the very beginning and the banana which Mr. Fraser was trying to feed him only served to make the entire lift smell of it. I have never been terribly fond of such extotic fruits, but I doubt I shall ever have the stomach for a banana again.

The whole venture was not a waste, however, as Ace did enjoy his lunch before he went back to work. He seemed terribly happy with my surprise. I shall have to do it again, however, I shall have to wait some time before I do so for I do not want him to always expect such things. Not that I wouldn’t love to have lunch with Ace every day, but I doubt his coworkers would appreciate such a constant intrusion.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 15, 1889

Dearest Journal,

We are to visit Hogsmeade this weekend to meet with Ace’s younger siblings: King and Jolie. When the plan was first laid out I was excited about it, but I must admit, as the days pass and the visit approaches I grow more apprehensive of the visit. So far everyone has been kind to me, but I can not imagine that all of Ace’s siblings will greet me as if nothing has happened. What if they don’t like me? What if they wished Ace had properly courted me before we married? What if there is gossip at Hogsmeade and they hold that against me for what it has done to them? I can not bare the thought that they might not like me, for they are all I have for family now. Perhaps I shall find the courage to speak to Ace of the matter this evening.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 16, 1889

Dearest Journal,

Ace assured me all would be well today when I spoke to him of it last night. But what he could not anticipate is Mrs. Calliope Riley’s attention to me on the street. She was the most severe in talking to me when she has hardly deemed to do so all these years we have known each other. But I do not wish to dwell on such unpleasant things. It was bad enough that Hogsmeade smelled so, and that it was cold and dreary outside.

Enough of the complaints, I shall turn to a happier topic. Ace’s brother, King, seemed to take to me well enough and Jolie missed us at tea. I suppose I shall have to meet her properly on their holiday break. I should like to see her and Sybille again. Why, the last time I saw Sybille she hadn’t even started Hogwarts yet and she is already a second year!

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 18, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I have been feeling the most terribly under the weather since we returned from Hogsmeade. Everything makes my stomach lurch and tumble. I shall be most relieved when this whole affair is over. Ace frets over me so, but I am glad that he has returned to work so he does not see me in such a state.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 21, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I have been feeling better since I last wrote. I had thought that with the return of my good humors I should treat myself to that bakery in Diagon Alley I do so enjoy. Of course, I decided that I should venture out on foot as I thought the air might do me some good. It was foolish, to look back on it now. I found myself rather lost and then to make it worse the ill humors hit me again as I found myself in a neighborhood I very much did not wish to be in.

I have written to mother’s healer and I shall meet with him tomorrow. I begin to worry that perhaps my health is not all that it should be.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!

November 22, 1889

Dearest Journal,

I have the greatest news to tell you! But I promised myself I would not deprive my husband from being the first to hear of it, and so, you too, shall not even know of it until he does.

What I shall indulge you, my dearest friend, is that tomorrow I shall finally show him the Flint House. I visited today and all is in order and ready to be seen. Oh! I am so excited! There are so many surprises awaiting Ace that I hardly know how I shall make it through the evening without spoiling them for him. Tomorrow will not come soon enough.

Lucille

  

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Thank you MJ for an amazingly Lucy set!