In addition to being asked to leave the party on Valentine's Day after the incident, my mother claims to have been uninvited to a lunch party next week and snubbed for a tea the first week of March. Is the same true in your household? I know you have at least one unmarried sister and would hate to be the cause of any trouble for her.

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Miss Binns,

My mother has expressed similar disappointment in having been uninvited to her monthly herbology club luncheon. My sister Tilda is no debutante, but I worry that it will be only a matter of time before she begins missing out in invitations to things she cares about.

- Lachlan MacFusty

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I have an idea for how this might be mended, but if it were to work I would need you to trust me.

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Miss Binns,

I don't know how trust will get rid of the rumors.

- Lachlan MacFusty

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We've no power to prevent Mrs. Finch from talking, but there might be a way to prevent people from believing her.

I need you to tell me something not many people know. Not a deep secret, exactly, but not common knowledge either. The sort of thing someone might only know if they'd been in your company often in the previous few months.

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Miss Binns,

What sort of secret? A "I once was nearly mauled by a dragon" kind of secret, or something deeper? And how will a secret stop her from talking?

- Lachlan MacFusty

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It won't stop her from talking; try to keep up. It might stop people from believing her.

I need to know the sort of thing you might often think of saying, but seldom would. Perhaps the sort of secret you might share if you were drunk but not if you were sober. The sort of thing someone might only know or remember if they'd been paying close attention.

Do you need an example?

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Miss Binns,

It's difficult to keep up when I can't follow your train of thought. I can't imagine an example would hurt.

- Lachlan MacFusty

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Very well.

I write letters to a gentleman I've never met and likely never will. My family doesn't know. I keep a secret post box at the office in Diagon Alley to receive the correspondence.

Once I went to a Muggle pub in London for the express purpose of spying on a friend. I didn't tell anyone where I was going and I gave a fake name when someone asked. This friend didn't know I was there, still doesn't know, and would likely never forgive me if they did.

The pet rabbit I gave my niece last year I actually purchased in order to feed to another animal, but it wasn't interested in the rabbit and I wasn't interested in a pet.

Does that give you an idea, or should I go on?

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Miss Binns,

Somehow your secrets confirm my assessment of your character while simultaneously baffling me. I have questions.

But I guess I should give you what you ask for first. I'll give you two.

One of the reasons I decided to go into quidditch instead of dragon-keeping is that I worried I'd be mauled. I've seen bad things happen to family members. I'd be called a coward if they ever found out, but I don't think it matters much now that I'm working on the reserve.

And: I'm no good at magic. I learn to do everything by hand because of it. Hence the stitching.

- Lachlan MacFusty

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You're free to ask whatever you like, but I probably won't answer. It's not as though we're friends. Circumstantial allies, at best, and I've told you quite a bit already.

But anyway, I think I can work with that. Thank you.

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