Unhealed Hearts - Printable Version
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RE: Unhealed Hearts - Lachlan MacFusty - February 5, 2021
Lachlan shook his head. She'd made her choice, but that meant nothing when her actions didn't align. It wasn't as if they'd fallen onto the couch that night by mistake; she'd told him she loved him, she'd told him she cared. Sex was not an accidental thing. She could apologize all day, every day, and it meant nothing now. Months had passed, the damage had been done, and she still seemed to hold the expectation that this would just - pass.
He couldn't meet her eye. He stared at the floor, his breath wavering as he tried to simultaneously stop himself from crying and yelling at her. This was the most frustrating situation; she was in his house, after following him from the shop, trying to tell him how they wouldn't have had a chance at all. "If you thought we would have had no chance, then why? Why to you keep trying to justify it to yourself?" Obviously they fought, but before she'd gone and left him high and dry they'd gone through fights, healed, and gotten closer. Isn't that how they ended up on the couch together? Couldn't she see that his love for her hadn't appeared overnight, despite what she seemed to think?
"I'm sorry things weren't smooth between us, but I said it once and I'll say it again: you never me a chance. We met while I was on my way to train for the Quidditch World Cup, where I killed someone, then we were stuck in the arctic, and then you - you left. It wasn't exactly the ideal atmosphere for romance to blossom." And frankly it was ridiculous. It was over a period of three, four months that they'd known each other and Fallon had decided that there was no chance because he hadn't moved fast enough. But he knew the truth: someone else moved faster, and she wasn't willing to stick it out and wait to see what happened.
"I know you've moved on—I get it. But if you stopped loving me, stop acting like it matters so much to you. It won't help." He took a step back and took a breath. He needed to get through this, and then - well, he might need a trip to the quidditch pitch. Maybe the whorehouse. He needed relief. He needed something.
He couldn't meet her eye. He stared at the floor, his breath wavering as he tried to simultaneously stop himself from crying and yelling at her. This was the most frustrating situation; she was in his house, after following him from the shop, trying to tell him how they wouldn't have had a chance at all. "If you thought we would have had no chance, then why? Why to you keep trying to justify it to yourself?" Obviously they fought, but before she'd gone and left him high and dry they'd gone through fights, healed, and gotten closer. Isn't that how they ended up on the couch together? Couldn't she see that his love for her hadn't appeared overnight, despite what she seemed to think?
"I'm sorry things weren't smooth between us, but I said it once and I'll say it again: you never me a chance. We met while I was on my way to train for the Quidditch World Cup, where I killed someone, then we were stuck in the arctic, and then you - you left. It wasn't exactly the ideal atmosphere for romance to blossom." And frankly it was ridiculous. It was over a period of three, four months that they'd known each other and Fallon had decided that there was no chance because he hadn't moved fast enough. But he knew the truth: someone else moved faster, and she wasn't willing to stick it out and wait to see what happened.
"I know you've moved on—I get it. But if you stopped loving me, stop acting like it matters so much to you. It won't help." He took a step back and took a breath. He needed to get through this, and then - well, he might need a trip to the quidditch pitch. Maybe the whorehouse. He needed relief. He needed something.
RE: Unhealed Hearts - Fallon Gillespie - February 5, 2021
Romantic love was a relatively new concept for Fallon, as before Lachlan and Jesse she hadn't ever considered it for herself. Truthfully, she sometimes wondered if she was happier without it, back when it was just her and Malou happily existing in their flat together. Fallon could've grown old with Malou as the sister spinsters they dreamed themselves to be had she never fallen for either man. Malou would never have caused this much turmoil.
His words cut deeper than any fight of theirs yet. Lachlan thought that in choosing her love for him would just vanish, and perhaps in some ways it had with steadfast avoidance of the topic. But, Fallon still felt for him as she did five months ago — desperate for his survival and happiness. She still cared, still loved him in a way.
"I never stopped." She confessed quietly, her eyes downcast towards the floor between them. "It wasn't easy or a happy choice to make. Either way someone was hurt. Either way I lost a man I cared for beyond my wildest imagination." She didn't expect forgiveness or understanding, but Merlin did she wish he would. Sighing deeply, Fallon shrugged hopelessly and looked towards him with sad eyes. "And I lost you."
RE: Unhealed Hearts - Lachlan MacFusty - February 5, 2021
Lach shook his head. Nothing she could say now would make things easier. The only thing he could gain now was more pain, more reason to hold on, more reason to put his personal life on hold because of his inability to get her out of his mind.
He turned around. He had to put some physical distance between them, had to his his face from her. He was hurt and there was no hiding that, but his expression was just about all he had left to hide. She knew his heart, how he longed for her. She knew how she'd hurt him, how he couldn't let go.
"I think the hardest part... is knowing that after all we went through—my lowest point, all that hardship—you left and acted as if I didn't exist," he said quietly. "You toyed with me, however unintentional, and - I didn't think you had it in you."
He turned around. He had to put some physical distance between them, had to his his face from her. He was hurt and there was no hiding that, but his expression was just about all he had left to hide. She knew his heart, how he longed for her. She knew how she'd hurt him, how he couldn't let go.
"I think the hardest part... is knowing that after all we went through—my lowest point, all that hardship—you left and acted as if I didn't exist," he said quietly. "You toyed with me, however unintentional, and - I didn't think you had it in you."
RE: Unhealed Hearts - Fallon Gillespie - February 5, 2021
A stab wound would have been less painful than his quiet confession. Fallon yearned to reach for him, to wrap her arms around him and provide comfort however she was able, but knew any such move would be construed as further toying. Not only that, but in making her choice she lost any right to even make such an offer. Lachlan deserved better than that — better than her.
"I truly didn't think you thought of me as more than a friend," she replied quietly. Taking the last of the four coins, Fallon gently dropped them upon the coffee table. She did as she came to do and now she ought to leave him. "I never — all I can say is I'm sorry, Lachlan. And I understand why you hate me so." She turned about the room trying to locate he front door, as using his floo felt wrong. "I'll - uhm. I'll let myself out."
RE: Unhealed Hearts - Lachlan MacFusty - February 13, 2021
There was no reason to argue further. Fallon was not his, she was never his, and she was never going to be his. He remained quiet as she apologized once further, and then nodded when she said she'd let herself out. He decided right there and then that he would never speak to her again.