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Victorians could hire 'professional mourners' to attend their loved one's funeral. These people would partake in the procession and were not allowed to speak, just look awfully sad! — Rune


— Submit your own —
WANTED:

"The Prodigal Sister" for Ophelia Devine. Faked deaths, scandal, and schemes!
Kristoffer was going to be great at this, because he was great at everything. Also his memory was greater than everyone else's, because he bet no one else had ever lost their virginity somewhere exotic like Morocco. Hell, he bet no one else had even lost their virginity. Inexperienced losers.

Kristoffer Lestrange in Shining, Shimmering Splendour


— Nominate a quote —
7 Deadly Sins

Complete seven threads, one where your character displays each of the Seven Deadly Sins — Pride, Lust, Sloth, Envy, Weath, Gluttony, and Greed. Each thread should be at least ten posts, with at least three being your own. Character accounts can be combined.

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Classifieds
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— The —
Daily Prophet
Price One Knut
April 15th, 1888
Classifieds
Prophet Readers Beg, Borrow, and Steal!

Seeking Fliers

New broommaker seeks flight enthusiasts to test new broomsticks. 5k for day’s work. Single parents need not apply—will not be liable for orphans!
Cannons seek new blood:

The Chudley Cannons will be holding open trials on Saturday, May 5th to flesh out reserve team. Would-be should report to Chudley stadium by 9 o’clock and are instructed to bring their own broomstick, though subpar brooms will be replaced on signing. Mediwizard on site.
Affected by the moon?

If the waxing of the moon makes you ill, a London-based potioneer seeks your services to test a new potion to counter these lunar effects. Please inquire directly to the Prophet; all serious candidates will be forwarded to the gentleman in question.
Wanted: Maid

Sociable Wellingtonshire home is seeking an additional maid to meet housekeeping needs and societal obligations. Successful candidates will have at least three years’ experience, ideally in a large household. Competitive pay based upon experience and disposition. Single witches only, please! Two references required.

Companion for Aging Widow

Seeking companionship for my mother, a resident of North Bartonburg. Pleasant women who are not into gossip and who have reached thirty years or more preferred. I am required to travel for my work, and so I often worry that my mother is lonely since the loss of her husband and my wife during the Laughing Plague. Serious inquiries only.
Selling: Land in Irvingly

Selling Ministry-issued plot of land in Irvingly’s Swallowbury district. Undeveloped. No asking price but will entertain all serious offers. Please inquire via owl to Mrs. Odira Potter of Thimblewhit Turn, N. Bartonburg.
Maid for Local Inn

Responsible, hardworking individual no younger than fifteen needed to join existing staff for the upkeep of The Irvingly Arms. Magic not required, and no magic is to be performed on premises. Must be respectable in character and appearance.

Interested parties to inquire in person to Mr. Atticus Kirke
Tutor Needed

Dedicated father seeks knowledgeable tutor of either sex for daughter, aged 15. The successful candidate will be experienced, with references, and able to instruct across the magical core subjects. Knowledge of muggle literature and history an asset, but not required. Pupil is of high intellect and curiosity whose health does not permit her to attend Hogwarts. Her malady is not contagious, though open-mindedness from interested candidates is essential.


Interested parties should respond to this advertisement directly; paper will forward all genuine inquiries. Position may be live-out or live-in, with healthy compensation regardless.
Gulliver Doran
Written by Kayte; images stolen from Witch Weekly
Coding also stolen from WW #SorryNotSorry
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Please CC Cassius Lestrange on all PMs.


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