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Cannons Best Howlers [And More!]
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— The —
Daily Prophet
Price One Knut
November 22nd, 1891

Cannons Best Howlers
Quidditch Season Off to a Normal Start

Yesterday's Quidditch match saw the Hogsmeade Howlers, under the new leadership of Mr. Mikail Karim, face off against the Chudley Cannons on the Cannons pitch. The bulk of the three-hour game saw the Howlers scoring heavily against the Chudley Cannons, racking up twenty-one goals in the time it took the Cannons to score nine. Ultimately, though, the game was decided when Chudley Cannons seeker Mr. Cassius Lestrange caught the snitch.

This game was almost a textbook Howlers-Cannons match, at least from the Howlers' perspective: the Hogsmeade Howlers rely heavily on their chasers' offensive strategy, and their seeking has been spotty in previous seasons. Additionally, after serving as second-string seeker for the British National Team, one would expect Mr. Lestrange to be in for a good season. (In theory - Mr. Cassius Lestrange has been an erratic seeker in previous seasons.) On their third season of leadership under Mr. Theodore Gallivan following the presumed death of Mr. Nathaniel Gallivan, one would also expect the Cannons to hit their competitive groove once more.

Mr. Mikail Karim, the new sponsor of the Hogsmeade Howlers following Mr. Mitch Quiddel's sale of the team, commented, "While this is a regrettable start to the season, our Chasers performed admirably and I look forward to overcoming this early shortcoming."

The Chudley Cannons win was followed almost immediately by news that Mr. Cassius Lestrange had been promoted to serve as captain. Mr. Theodore Gallivan, sponsor, commented for the team: “We are confident this will be only the first of many wins for the Cannons this season. Not only has Lestrange continued to showcase his successes as seeker, he has proven he is the right player to lead from the front and reinvigorate the team and our tactics going forward."

The Quidditch season may have started, but not every team has confirmed their stadiums are up to the new standards, starting rumors that some teams are more likely to go bankrupt than actually achieve the new safety standards.
Quincey Quadwapple
Written by Beanie


Please CC Aldous Crouch on all PMs.
#2
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— The —
Daily Prophet
Price One Knut
February 22nd, 1890

PARKINSON ENGAGED
Selwyn Bastard The Bride-To-Be

The engagement between Chester Parkinson and Liliana Selwyn was announced one week ago at her birthday party, and her family has announced that it was officialized Sunday morning.

Miss Selwyn is, most notably, the bastard daughter of Trystan Selwyn, and (although acknowledged by her father) was expected to have little success securing such an objectively advantageous match. Mr. Parkinson, the second son to the Parkinson family, was not expected to marry anything other than a natural-born daughter from a good family, and thus the match comes as a surprise to those well-acquainted with him.

The terms of the marriage are uncertain, what is certain is that that the match is likely to put his brother, Mr. Maximilian Parkinson, is a precarious position, as he remains yet unmarried despite rumors of an attachment.
Fidelia Spiller
Written by Bree


Please CC Aldous Crouch on all PMs.


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