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The Veela Problem: A Lawyer Weighs In
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— The —
Daily Prophet
Price One Knut
April 6th, 1888
The Veela Problem: A Lawyer Weighs In
The Ministry's Hands are Bound

Amid rising rumors that Minister Ross and the Wizengamot are looking for new ways to regulate veela after the Mrs. Lyness vs. Mr. Albert Pettigrew debacle, the Daily Prophet reached out to see what the problem is. Why can't the Ministry just kick out all the veela? This should not, consensus holds, be nearly as big of a problem as it is.

Not true, says our source. A former Magical Law Enforcement lawyer and current private practice attorney, Mr. August Echelon-Arnost was willing to speak to us on the record regarding the veela problem, unlike most of his colleagues in the Ministry of Magic.

"Veela are beings," Mr. Echelon-Arnost explained, "Which means they are afforded rights just like you and I, and they cannot just be removed from the nation by the Ministry. Not that any male would be successful in the attempt."

"Although one may consider that vampires register with the Ministry and veela do not, there's a very simple reason for that: veela are not native to Britain. Vampires are made, so they can be."

When asked to elaborate, Mr. Echelon-Arnost explained that there are likely no more than five full veela in the country. "It seems a waste of resources to commit too much enforcement to creatures who, in their total population count, would be outnumbered at a garden party."

GULLIVER DORAN
Written by Beanie
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