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Letters to Juliet 1 - Printable Version

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Letters to Juliet 1 - Madeleine Backus - February 14, 2022

Dear Frog Prince,
I hope you are as sweet as your letter seems.  I believe I meet your criteria- at least my vanity hopes that I am fun and kind - and from the sounds of your letter I believe we may be two of a kind. 

My parents are bakers, as is indeed my sister.  I always loved making enchanted pastries and sweet treats.  I sometimes fear any spouse I may attract might end up rather portly as cooking is most certainly my love language. 

I too have a fondness for treacle tart. 

Kind Regards
Frog Princess


Enclosed with the letter - is a treacle tart - subject to a magical preservation charm.

Witch Weekly Holly Scrimgeour

RE: Letters to Juliet 1 - Witch Weekly - February 14, 2022

Mr. Quincey Honeyduke,

Witch Weekly is pleased to inform you that your recent submission to our Lonely Hearts article has generated a response. Witch Weekly is devoted to providing help to all of our readers, no matter what their social disadvantages, and we are delighted to provide this service to the lovelorn in our magical community. We hope that you will be able to create a happy ending with our help, instead of being doomed to a tragically lonely life.

Please see the enclosed letter and advise us whether you will need your advertisement repeated in further issues of our magazine.
Y. Ventus
Editor in Chief
Witch Weekly
Quincey Honeyduke Elsie Kirke


RE: Letters to Juliet 1 - Quincey Honeyduke - February 25, 2022

February 15th, 1892 (?)

Miss Princess,

My sincerest apologies Miss, as I am completely unfamiliar with which letter it is that you are referring to. I have received a notice from Witch Weekly about something called a "Lonely Heart" but I do not know what this means. I am quite clueless as to what the magazine publishes, but I can assure you I did not submit anything to it, especially not of this nature.

I apologize profusely again for the misunderstanding and I appreciate your treacle tart, which was delicious. I have enclosed some sweets as a thank you and I wish you the best in your endeavors.
Sincerely,
Q. Honeyduke


RE: Letters to Juliet 1 - Quincey Honeyduke - February 25, 2022

February 15th, 1892

Witch Weekly Staff,

I fear there has been a mistake; I did not submit anything for your column. I would quite appreciate it if you could remove the addition from any further editions of the magazine.

I have enclosed some sweets in show of appreciation for your time.
Cheers,
Q. Honeyduke

Witch Weekly

RE: Letters to Juliet 1 - Madeleine Backus - February 25, 2022

Mister Honeyduke,
How embarassing! I am most sorry, and I appreciate your polite letter. Given that the advert was not your own, it would not have been unsurprising if you had not responded at all.

The treats were more than recompense for any lingering embarassment that my writing to an unsuspecting man may have caused. You will appreciate Hogsmeade is a small place - and I should die of embarrassment if it were to be known that I made a habit of writing to the lonely hearts.

I hope that if we meet on the streets, we may pretend that we met in some manner that was not the lonely hearts portions of ladies magazine? As such, I enclose some hot custard tarts - they are definitely intended to be a bribe for your silence.

Kind Regards
Miss Madeleine Backus



RE: Letters to Juliet 1 - Quincey Honeyduke - March 6, 2022

February 18th, 1892 (?)

Miss Backus,

If it makes you feel any better, I have received two additional letters from other Witch Weekly readers, so you are not alone in your pursuits. After having read the ad, thanks to one of my staff, I have a feeling I know where it came from. I feel quite guilty for wasting anyone's time who bothered to write in, so I felt it necessary to respond to each one.

Long story short, your secret is safe with me, your bribe is most delicious, and again, best of luck!
Sincerely,
Q. Honeyduke