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Head of Dueling Commission Office & Gimpy Asshat

29 year old Halfblood
5 ft. 3 in   ❤   Unattached
played by Té
177 Posts

Barnabas Skeeter
"Mr. Skeeter is a modern hero. It is men like him that make this world a better place. Let us all take example from this extraordinary man. If you ask me, he should at least get his own chocolate frog card as a reward of his heroic deeds."
Witch Weekly

Full Name: Barnabas Skeeter

Nickname(s): Skeeter, or Barney - which he will not respond to. Also commonly used are Asshat, Grumpy Stumpy, etc.

Birthdate: June 27th, 1859

Age: 29

Occupation: Head of Dueling Commission Office

Blood Status: Halfblood

Residence: 6660 Ghoul Gardens, North Bartonburg, Hogsmeade

Hogwarts House: Slytherin

Wand: Cedar, 9 3/4", Unyielding, Dragon Heartstring

Maeve Connolly | "Wife" | 1860

Doyle Connolly | Grandfather | b. 1792
Birgit Connolly née ----- | Grandmother | b. 1797 d. 1858
Eileen Brennan née Connolly | Aunt | b. 1820
Colm Brennan | Uncle | b. 1817
Cillian Brennan | Cousin | b. 1848
Connolly Brennan | Cousin | b. 1853
Niamh ---- née Brennan | Cousin | b. 1855
— Ronan ----- | First Cousin Once Removed | b. 1879
Pádraig Connolly | Father | b. 1823
Caitríona Connolly née Brennan | Mother | b. 1831
Donovan Connolly | Brother | b. 1855
Finlay Connolly | Brother | b. 1861
Brighid Connolly | Sister | b. 1867
Domhnall Connolly | Brother | b. 1870
Siobhán Byrne | Aunt | b. 1827 d. 1884
Desmond Byrne | Uncle | b. 1825
Connell Byrne | Cousin | b. 1852
Finnian Byrne | Cousin | b. 1857
Lorcan Byrne | Cousin | b. 1861
Gilroy Connolly | Uncle | b. 1829
Keira Connolly née -- | Aunt | b. 1832
Dublin Connolly | Cousin | b. 1861
Belfast Connolly | Cousin | b. 1867
Marriage Annulled Jan 2, 1889
Maxwell Skeeter | Father 1829 -
Martha Skeeter | Mother
Mortimer Skeeter | Brother
Archibald Skeeter | Brother
--- Irina Skeeter | Sister-In-Law 18** - 1885
--- Reginald Skeeter | Nephew 1885 -
Antonius Skeeter | Brother
Thompson Skeeter | Brother
Tamsin Skeeter | Sister

Edison Skeeter | Uncle | 1825 - 1862
Morwenna Skeeter nee Flynn | Aunt |
Mason Skeeter | Cousin | 1856 -
Quite short in stature, Barnabas only comes in at a meager 5'3" tall and 143 lbs. He has a shock of light blonde hair that he has trimmed on a weekly basis so that it remains pristine. A strong jaw, thick brows and an unfortunately wide mouth are what most people notice about him. His grey eyes are often cold and judging. He wears rather boring attire and usually can be found in traditional wizard robes of a black or grey color - exquisitely tailored. He is right handed.

The summer of 1884, he added a tattoo of a ~botanical~ nature one drunken night with the lads on his left ass cheek, inspired by a hatecrush. In the summer of 1885, he lost the lower half of his left leg in a troll attack. He now uses a prosthetic and a cane.

Know-it-all, judgemental, ambitious, hot tempered, suck up, traditional, competitive and insecure over his size.

Barnabas Skeeter


Barnabas was born the second son to what would later be a rather large family. He was a small for his age, even in infancy. There was speculation that there may be a birth defect that caused this, but as he grew, he seemed to be able to function perfectly well - he was simply short. As the years passed, more siblings joined them.

Barnabas gave special attention to his studies, even as a youngster. From a young age, he realized that if he were to do well in everything, his father would praise him. It was because of this that he was proud to rattle off facts and recite difficult Latin and classical literature in his father's presence. It gave him a rather large ego and he quickly became a child that did not like to be wrong. He gleefully pointed out when others were, and was quite difficult to get along with. Because of this, he did not become particularly close to any of his siblings. They would call him "Barney" to tease him, though he hated it. He believed nicknames to be demeaning of his intelligence.

He attended Hogwarts and was sorted into Slytherin. He did well in his subjects and was elected prefect in his fifth year. He continued on as prefect in his sixth year and hoped for head boy for his seventh, but was beat out by (name here.) Barnabas is still bitter over it, as he does not like to lose. He did retain his prefect position that year, however.

Slytherin Prefect
1874 - 1877

OWL Scores
Charms . . . O
DADA . . . A
Herbology . . . P
Muggle Studies . . . O
Potions . . . E
Transfiguration . . . E

NEWT Scores
Charms . . . O
DADA . . . E
Muggle Studies . . . O
Potions . . . A
Transfiguration . . . O

After completing his education, he landed a job at the Ministry in the Improper Use of Magic Office as an investigator. He hoped to continue moving up along the ladder rungs until he becomes a department head.

Post Hogwarts life saw some dramatic changes in his life: his brother Archie's wife dies in childbirth. The child named Reginald, survived.

During his work at the Ministry, he has been bayoneted in the gut, had fingers sliced off and required them be reattached (by botanical named lady), and was also hexed to have a very difficult to remove donkey's tail. (He'd had to have special robes sewn to keep it hidden for four months until its removal.) He has also traveled to Boston for a month to assist in the improper use of magic there and developed a penchant for coffee (he takes it black.)

Socially, he's made some people angry, others charmed and has a sexual-tension/hate relationship with ~botanical named lady~. She was the sole inspiration for the tattoo on his left ass cheek that he got one drunken night, thanks to his friends. It is a very misshaped ~botanical~. He is glad that he can't see it unless using a looking glass, needless to say.

During the summer of 1885, he defended Padmore Park against a troll attack and in reward, a troll bit off the lower half of his left leg. Rather than be an invalid, he was able to switch to a department that did not require so much physical activity - the Dueling Commission Head of Office. With the promotion and his newly one-legged status in mind, in January 1886 he proceeded to propose that female sanctioned duels should be illegal in The Daily Prophet.

In March of 1886, it was brought before the Wizengamot. The proposal sparked a lot of public attention and in the end, the Wizengamot decided to allow women to fully duel each other as well as men without any restrictions. Barnabas quickly turned his viewpoint around and "saw the light" in the Wizengamot's decision... publicly, at least.

Socially, he's made plenty of people angry, others charmed and has a sexual-tension/hate relationship with Mrs. ~botanical name~ and Miss Maeve Connolly. The former was the sole inspiration for the misshapen ~botanical~ tattoo on his left ass cheek that he got one drunken night with the help of his friends' encouragement, whilst the latter wounded his pride by openly combating his stance on female dueling. He had also fallen in love with Miss Amelia Evans, who has a dog that he pretends not to be terrified of. Though rocky at first, their relationship turned into a full on courtship. He had acquired an engagement ring and had planned to propose marriage. It ended rather abruptly upon his original stance against women's dueling.

In the winter of 1887, he ran for the position of Minister of Magic as a centre-right candidate. Though he did not win, he was third runner up.

In June of 1888, he adopted a sassy corgie puppy named Queenie with the assistance of Elsie Beauregard, whom he decides would make a wonderful wife. Before he can make plans on how to properly go about seeing her more often (as he does not doubt that she would be thrilled that he was interested in her), he is consumed with the Fogsmeade dilemma and spends the remainder of the summer dealing with that, even "leading" an expedition group to solve the problem. His group does solve it, but he was sent back to the infirmary beforehand thanks to an injury involving his prosthetic.

On September 27, 1888, he receives an amortentia-laced letter and is suddenly very much in love with arch-enemy Maeve Connolly. The two whisk away to Gretna Green and are promptly wed. By October 1st, the amortentia effects wear off. While the Ministry offers to annul any marriages that are presented with proof, they are unable to procure an annulment. At first, Barnabas chooses to continue living in the Connolly home just to irritate Maeve (who has obviously kicked him out of their marital bed.) Eventually, that grows tiresome and he plans to return to his leased townhouse in Hogsmeade, only to discover that he'd prematurely cancelled his lease the day after he'd wed.

The pair decide a divorce is in order, though before it goes through, the woman who was behind the amortentia letters turns herself in. January 2nd, 1889 sees them officially granted an annulment.

  • He heroically lost part of his leg in the troll attack on Padmore Park in summer of 1885. (It was featured in Witch Weekly.)
  • He and Amelia Evans courted from # - #. Several Witch Weekly articles covered them, even mentioning a possible engagement.
  • He ran for Minister of Magic in the 1887 elections and lost. (3rd runner up)
  • He's an asshole.
  • He married his arch-enemy, Maeve Connolly on September 27th, 1888 due to being drugged with amortentia. He lost his lease and lived with the Connolly family in County Galway, Ireland.
  • January 2nd, 1889, he was granted a marriage annulment and moved out of the chaos of the Connolly home.
1. He had been cursed with a donkey tail for four months.
2. He has a tattoo on his ass.
3. When he's drunk, he writes terrible, melodramatic love poems.
Played By:

Contact: Skype or PM Declan Wood

Plot Preferences:

Typically, I'm a "have a vague idea or inspiration for the thread and then wing it" kind of girl. Bump into each other and proceed with small talk meet and greets kill me, likely because I'm terrible at small talk IRL. xD Give me some action, some mystery, some adventure!

I will plot out specifics if asked. I won't pre-plot romance, I prefer for that to happen organically. I am willing to toss characters together to see how they get on, but if there isn't any chemistry I won't force the relationship.

My most favorite threads are comedic threads where I am humiliating my characters and angsty threads where my characters are at their worst. I don't pay attention to post count and generally write whatever I'm inspired to at the moment. I have found that my average is anywhere from 200-500 words per post.

As for limits, I don't have many. I do draw the line at bestiality and pedophilia, but I'm totally fine with violence, cursing and sexual situations.


Registration Date: January 28, 2018

Date of Birth: Hidden (30 years old)

Local Time: August 5, 2020 at 12:53 PM


Joined: January 28, 2018

Last online: February 20, 2019 – 2:22 AM


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*Links have been ported over from old board and likely do not work at this time.

Ship Index

Amelia Evans

  1. Amelia gives him a bloody nose after he accidentally gropes her.
  2. Barnabas apologizes for accidentally groping her.
  3. Amelia sends him a letter.
  4. Barnabas rescues Amelia from hexed owl cages.
  5. Barnabas imposes on the crime report interview for hexed owl cages.
  6. They consume amortentia'd pastries at the Summer Solstice Celebration and can't keep their hands off of each other.
  7. Barnabas saves Amelia and Ivy Scrivenshaft from a troll attack - though gets maimed in the process.
  8. Amelia visits him in the hospital and proceeds to flee when things get serious.
  9. The pair run into each other at Winkle's birthday party and he proceeds to declare that they have something special, propose marriage and get shoved into the Black Lake all in one conversation.
  10. They makeup enough for her to agree to let him see her again.
  11. He asks her uncle for his blessing for courtship.
  12. They begin to court officially.
  13. Amelia finds Barnabas sick with dragon breath potion.
  14. They nearly rip each other's clothes off at her family's Christmas party and declare their love for one another.
  15. Amelia reacts to his anti-female dueling stance and breaks the courtship off.
  16. Barnabas sends her melodramatic letters that get ignored.
  17. Barnabas rescues drunk Amelia from Padmore Park for the Leap Day Mini-SWP. She puts on the engagement ring he was going to give her and when they wake up the next day, they assume that somehow they became engaged.
AU Threads
Ivy Scrivenshaft

Maeve Connolly

Barnabas Skeeter's Signature
set by MJ | Kindly tag @Prudence Browne in replies

Barnabas Skeeter's Most Liked Post
Post Subject Numbers of Likes
Bachelor #5 to Stay Away From 4
Thread Subject Forum Name
Bachelor #5 to Stay Away From 1888
Post Message
March 25th, 1888 — The Three Broomsticks

"Mister Barnabas Skeeter is quite easily the least offensive of these group of men. However, this Witch Weekly reporter cannot forget the stance that the man originally held on female dueling. Being quite the advocate for making female sanctioned dueling illegal, he changed his tune once the Wizenmagot made their decision. Was it a change of heart or was Mister Skeeter simply trying to save face? Either way, a young lady must beware of a man who is so fickle in his opinions!" — Witch Weekly, 5 Bachelors to Stay Away From

Barnabas would never admit to being an avid reader of the ladies gossip magazine. He burned every issue that didn't contain anything about himself promptly after reading it. The ones that did mention him were kept in a locked, fire-proof box stuffed safely into the back of his wardrobe. He'd purchased about thirty copies of the ones that referenced him being a hero and had put that in another locked box - this time in his lockbox at Gringott's. When he'd seen this particular article however, he'd been shocked — and if he were being totally honest — a tiny bit destroyed to see his face included in the list of Bachelors to Stay Away From. They had grouped him in with the likes of Howell Merick and Jude Wright! It made no sense! D:<

Unable to contain himself, he marched into The Three Broomsticks for breakfast that morning and ordered his usual. He hadn't brought the magazine with him, of course, but the article was seared into his brain. He was sat at his usual table, in the corner furthest from the door but near the window that faced north. He sat and ate his meal in fuming silence. The tension rolled off of him in waves. Unbeknownst to him, he had begun to mumble about it - even going so far as to recite the cursed paragraph to himself.

Finally, he couldn't take it anymore! He slammed his mug of coffee down (brought from home of course, as they didn't serve his special brew here, despite his insistent suggestions that they do so) on the table so hard that it splashed onto the table cloth and the vibration clattered the other dishes on the table. He whirled to those sitting at the table nearest him and demanded heatedly, "Would you believe an accusation that said I am fickle?! Fickle! Of all things!"